If you are struggling managing your kids' public tantrums, you are not alone.
It is every mom and every parents’ nightmare when a child makes a public tantrum because it is embarrassing, awkward and humiliating.
In the live interview with Neelanjana Choudhury for Working Moms Academy’s feature on Parenting Practices from India, she shared 3 ways on how she successfully managed her daughter's tantrums.
Her advice is a must watch for all moms and parents who want to become better parents because she shared a lot of wisdom on how she is raising her 5 year old princess. You can watch the full interview here.
3 WAYS TO MANAGE KIDS TANTRUM
To manage your kids tantrums, remember the acronym WAR.
- Work with your kids to help them process their emotions
Emotions have meaning and most kids express it as tantrums because kids have no idea how to express what they feel, especially when they are younger.
To help her daughter process her emotions, Neelanjana gave her daughter “a physical place” where she can fully express her emotions.
She shared how she allowed her daughter to stay in one room if she wanted to cry and to come out when she is feeling better. This gave her daughter the physical space to air her feelings.
This technique works because this allows a child to process her own emotions and calm herself. Having a space to express emotions can help kids move from being at the mercy of their emotions, to being in control of themselves and their impact on others.
- Allow your kids to speak up
Every child and individual needs 3 things - to be heard, understood and accepted. Allowing your kids to speak up enables a child to meet all these 3 needs.
Neelanjana shared that when her daughter started speaking, she encouraged her to speak up and tell what she felt. She can share her emotions without judgment whether it is right or wrong and without the need to explain why she feels that emotion.
This technique works because naming the emotions while you are experiencing it allows a child to shift from processing the experience through the ‘reptile brain’ to our ‘rational brain,’ providing a greater degree of control. Neuroscientists like to say about emotions, “Name it to tame it!”
- Reward and recognize your kids positive behavior
To help your kids regulate their emotions, rewarding good behavior is one of the best ways to do it. Rewarding your kids is a positive reinforcement to encourage good behavior.
Neelanjana shared how creating 50 stars and giving her daughter 1 star everyday for good behavior helped her tame her emotions, appreciate herself and encourage good behavior. When her daughter completed 50 stars, she also received a gift as a reward for good behavior.
This technique works because rewarding a child helps build self-esteem. When a child develops one positive behavior and gets a lot of praise, then it is more likely for the child to continue her positive attitude.The key to make rewards work is to customize it based on your child's age, personality, and interests.
If you want to discover more parenting tips and tools, check Working Moms Academy’s YouTube channel because we have more live interviews and webinars about parenting. Watch out for our upcoming lives because we will feature parenting practices from Puerto Rico, Australia and Malaysia in the next 3 weeks.
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ABOUT WANDA
Wandalyn Tan-Calupig is the Founder of Working Moms Academy. After suffering from burnout in 2014, she is helping stressed and burnt-out working moms find balance and bliss, so moms can "have it all” - personal and professional success. Subscribe to Working Moms Academy’s Youtube channel (bit.ly/YOUTUBEWMA) and find 58+ videos and new content every week that can help you overcome the stress, demand and pressures of everyday life. Working Moms Academy is a platform and community that supports mothers struggling with stress and burnout by providing life tools that education lacks. It is one of the 20 finalists (out of 128 applications) of the Built to Last 2020 Hackathon, The First-ever Virtual Hackathon for Female Founders in South East Asia.