My Postpartum Experience
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Creating a human takes a toll on women’s bodies.
“Everyone expects you to be nothing less than overjoyed. Reality is, many women end up in a dark, discouraging place and don’t know where to turn or who to ask about it. We are supposed to be a hundred percent grateful and over the moon.” – Angel Falkner
Baby Blues or Postpartum Depression is not talked about enough wherein it needs to be.
Hi mga Mommies! Di kayo nag iisa!
I am a first time mom na dating hindi naniniwala at hindi naiintindahan ano nga ba ang ibig sabihin ng Postpartum Depression hanggang sa ako na mismo ang naka-witness nito.
Hirap matulog, weight loss or weight gain, sobrang pag-aalala, guilt, sadness, at marami pang iba. Halo-halo ang pakiramdam. Laging nasa isip ko dapat masaya ako kasi bliness ako ni Lord ng isang napakagwapong anak.
Pero tinatanong ko sa sarili ko, anong kulang? Bakit parang pakiramdam ko hindi ako buo. Until I discovered na I’m dealing with PPD.
Simula pa lang, I don’t have a good support system. Nahihiya ako na mag-open about sa nararamdaman ko kasi baka pagtawanan lang ako. Baka pagsabihan lang ako na ang OA ko.
I tried opening up sa isang taong malapit sakin at ang sabi sakin, “‘Yan kasi ang uso ngayon kaya feeling mo nararanasan mo, kung hindi viral ngayon ‘yan di mo yan nararanasan. Sa panahon dati, wala namang ganyan, ino-OA mo lang.”
From that time, hindi na ako ulit nag open sa kung sino man dahil mas lalong natritrigger ang PPD ko.
I questioned my worth as a mother, wife and my self-worth.
Since wala ako napagsasabihan at ako lang mag isa sa laban, nakuha kong saktan ang sarili ko which is not normal.
Kapag tulog na anak ko, walang dahilan umiiyak ako. Maliligo ako pagtungtong ko sa banyo umiiyak ako. Walang specific na dahilan ang pag-iyak ko pero ang alam ko lang sobrang nasasaktan ako without any specific reason.
One time, nagkaron ako ng lakas ng loob i-open ito sa pamilya ko and I’m so lucky na naiintindihan nila ako.
At first, nakakahiya na mag-open-up kasi baka lumala lang. But no. Since that day I opened up, naging magaan.
I also talked with many mommies with the same experience as mine. Having a good support system can lessen your PPD.
Maganda na nailalabas mo lahat ng mga thoughts mo para makahinga, para makapag-isip, at para kumalma. Always remember mommies, YOU DO NOT HAVE TO SUFFER IN SILENCE OR FEEL ASHAMED. Our babies need us to be healthy during a time when we are overwhelmed the most.
Postpartum depression is an illness that takes away our ability to access joy—during a time we need it the most.
Always remember Mommies, our strength is greater than any struggle. WE ARE FEARLESS!
We support each other therefore WE CAN DO and WE CAN WIN THIS!
In my experience, it was less about what I wasn’t told, and more about what I couldn’t understand until going through it.
Tulong tulong tayo mga Mommies! Kaya natin to! Kung need niyo makakausap, you can ping me!