A confident child is one who is happy, self-assured, and on the road to success. These are all indispensable traits for children, and all parents would be wise to instill these qualities in their kids as soon as possible.
As with anything in the realm of parenting, this is easier said than done. Luckily, a handful of experts have shared their 9 most highly recommended ways for parents to raise kids who are poised and buoyant. Check out the list of expert advice and be on your way to raising confident, happy children!
Promote resiliency
Parents have a particular tendency to come to the rescue, and save the day. It’s only natural for a parent to want to shield their kids from getting hurt, discouraged, or failing at something; however, who is that really helping? Kids need to be exposed to these facts of life. “Kids need to know that it’s okay to fail, and that it’s normal to feel sad, anxious, or angry,” says Robert Brooks, PhD, coauthor of Raising Resilient Children.
If your child never faces any obstacles on their own, they’ll never know how to overcome without a little help from Mom and/or Dad. “It’s particularly important for young children to have the chance to play and take risks without feeling that their parents will criticize or correct them for doing something wrong,” says Kathy Hirsh-Pasek, PhD, professor of psychology at Temple University.
For parents, one way significant way to promote resiliency is to let your kids see you fail or make mistakes. Just don’t make a big deal or fuss over your mistakes. This will teach your kids that to make a mistake is normal, and that we can always brush ourselves off and try again.
Find out what tips and tricks these experts have for raising your kids to be more confident than ever! Click next for more!
Mind your compliments
Your child thrives on encouragement, so you’ll need to give credit where credit is due. THere’s no denying that. However, one great way to nurture confidence is to monitor when you dish out your compliments. You shouldn’t ever compliment or praise your child for doing something they’re supposed to do. If you begin to compliment them all the time, you’ll be saturating them in encouragement and they’ll begin to lose track of when they’re genuinely doing a “good job”.
Try supplementing some of your compliments with a simple “thank you”. Or better yet, mix it up a bit. For example, if your kid draws you a picture, don’t just tell them it’s magnificent. Point out something specific and compliment their efforts there instead of generally addressing the work.
Practice applicable problem solving
Myrna Shure, PhD, author of Raising a Thinking Child, has worked extensively to cultivate confidence (among other things) in children. Her research has found that you can teach even a young child how to solve problems without the aid of an adult. The key is to minimally intervene in their issues. For example, if your child comes to you with a problem, instead of taking responsibility out of their hands, ask them how they think that problem could be resolved. Help them reach appropriate conclusions and figure out which solution works best. “Kids are confident when they’re able to negotiate getting what they want,” says Dr. Shure.
Find opportunities for them to spend time with adults
Seeing as children are incredibly impressionable, it only makes sense that spending quality time with more mature individuals such as your child’s aunt, uncle, grandparents, older siblings or cousins, or even their teachers would be beneficial. Kids who hang out around adults at a younger age are able to develop a wide array of perspective and will generally expand their mind. In short, the time spent with a more mature group will lead to boosted confidence.
Help them feel like they’re making a difference
“When children feel like they’re making a difference — whether it’s passing out cups at preschool or taking cookies to a nursing home — they feel more confident,” says Dr. Brooks. Kids who are assigned tasks or responsibilities, and complete those tasks are often more confident because it makes them feel accomplished. Try letting your child assist you with some of your responsibilities when appropriate in order to let them get a feel for your responsibilities. “[T]hey’ll see firsthand that grown-up tasks require effort, and he’ll be easier on himself when he has to work at things in the future,” says Dr. Hirsh-Pasek.
Find out what tips and tricks these experts have for raising your kids to be more confident than ever! Click next for more!
Nurture their sense of optimism
A child who focuses on the negative aspects in life at an early age is on the tumultuous road leading to pessimism. You need to help your child focus on the glass half full mentality. “Instead of offering glib reassurances to “look on the bright side,” encourage her to think about specific ways to improve a situation and bring them closer to their goals,” says Karen Reivich, PhD, coauthor of The Optimistic Child.
In other words, don’t just slap a metaphorical bandage on a discouraging situation. Help them reach their goals and achieve positivity instead of remaining in negativity and hiding behind a compliment.
Let them make choices
If you allow your child to make choices and decisions at a young age, you’ll cultivate a good sense of judgment in you kids. Obviously, you shouldn’t overwhelm your children with too many decisions. There are simply too many big decisions that only an adult, however, offering your children two or three options to a relatively big decision could do wonders for their confidence. Or, you could focus on the simple things. For example, offer your children two or three options of what to eat for dinner and allow them to make the choice.
Help them visualize their goals
Kids are dreamers, and there’s nothing wrong with that. Sure, not every kid will grow up to be an astronaut or a basketball superstar, but it’s important to help them visualize their goals at a young age. This will foster strong goals, and encourage a headstrong mentality towards reaching said goals. It’s important that you don’t ever lower your child’s goals.
Support their special interests
While it’s important to expose your children to a myriad of new activities, if they hold one more dearly than others, you should support and encourage their passion for that activity. Kids who can identify and feel proud of their passion at a young age are sure to excel in that hobby or whatever they get their hands on next. Not to mention that their sense of self-assurance in that hobby will apply many other facets in life. No matter what the hobby or interest your kids choose, you should be supportive and help to nurture their skills and passion towards it.
This article was originally published by Parents
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