Bianca Gonzalez Intal on her first year of motherhood: “Ang dami kong fears”

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Host and author Bianca Gonzalez Intal shares with us her journey as a first time mother, her parenting woes and what her hopes are for baby Lucia

When her daughter Lucia was just a few months old, host and author Bianca Gonzalez penned a heartfelt letter, which she shared on her blog.

In it, she wrote about her pregnancy until the first few weeks of motherhood. She wrote about how Lucia was an "easy baby" who made pregnancy a breeze. When she was 7 months along, she lost her dad; it was Lucia who kept her strong.

"You were such a brave girl. Even if I cried so much, I felt that you were so strong and that made me strong, too. Knowing that you were the happy thought of your abuelito during his final days made me so happy," she wrote. "That is when we really decided that your name should be Lucia. Because your name means "light", and you were definitely the light during that very difficult time."

Continuing, Bianca shared how much of a rollercoaster the first few weeks of being parents were for her and husband JC Intal: “You bring so, so, so much love and joy to your daddy and me, but at the same time, we're so scared and nervous, so tired and sleepless, and sometimes we feel helpless when you're fussy and we don't know why.”

We caught up with Bianca a year later, and she smiled when we mentioned the touching letter.

“Graba ata hormones ko nun! Between 2-3 months siya noon!” she told theAsianparent Philippines in an interview at the Every Girl Can conference, which was a day-long series of talks and panels discussions on womanhood and empowerment.

As to how she wants to raise her daughter to be empowered, she confesses she hasn’t really thought about it as she and husband JC Intal are currently “battling toddler problems”.

“Every day we think about saan naming siya ipapa-school. Anong magiging rules namin about computer, about playtime, about homework time? Yung parang hindi pa naming maisip yung (how to raise her to be empowered) kasi we’re still battling the toddler problems,” she said, adding that despite this, they both are enjoying this season of parenthood. “It’s an enjoyable stage but ang dami kong fears talaga as a first time mom.”

Chief of her concerns is how she will raise Lucia to be humble and diligent.

“Yung paano ko palalakihin yung anak ko na hindi entitled? Kasi now ang daming batang entitled kasi everything’s instant now eh,” she went on. “How do we teach her the value of working hard? How do we teach her to treat everyone with respect? These are the concerns we have pa lang now na yun ang pinakamalaking issues para samin.”

Going back to her open letter, the hands-on mom marveled at how she’s finally entered the season in her journey as a mom where she feels the love is reciprocated.

“When I wrote that letter to Lucia, baby na baby pa siya. One way lang ang love nung time na yun. Puro mother to baby lang, puro hirap. Pero now masarap na,” she gushed. “I call it ROI, may return of investment na yung pagod because she can embrace you, she can talk na, babble 'mama', she can walk to me, may balik na yung love so it’s a very rewarding masarap stage na mahirap pa din.”

READ: Bianca Gonzalez and JC Intal’s daughter Lucia turns 1

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