Do Parents Being on Their Phones Cause Delayed Speech and Short Attention Spans in Children?

Have you ever found yourself scrolling on your phone, only to look up and see your child sitting quietly beside you with no one to talk to? Scenes like this have become common in an era where screens dominate everyday life—even during what should be family bonding time. Many may think, “It’s just phone use, it’s not harming the child,” but the effects of parents using phones around children are more serious than they seem. Studies show that the effects of parents using phones around children include delayed speech, attention difficulties, and emotional disconnection.

This article explores the science and psychology behind the effects of parents using phones around children, helping families understand how simple habits may be quietly shaping their child’s development.

Effects of parents using phones around children: Do Parents Being on Their Phones Cause Delayed Speech in Children?

From birth to age six is the period when a child’s brain grows the fastest. They learn about the world through eye contact, listening, and interaction with adults—especially parents, who are essentially their “entire world.” When parents are constantly staring at their phones, children miss out on essential “serve and return” interactions, which are the foundation of early brain development. Talking with your child, responding immediately when they look at you or try to communicate—these interactions help build neural connections and strengthen the brain’s foundational structure.

Additionally, the behavior known as “phubbing” (phone + snubbing), which is ignoring someone in front of you to use your phone—in this case, your own child—can lead them to feel unimportant, unloved, or even invisible in their parents’ eyes. John Bowlby, a British psychologist who developed the Attachment Theory, emphasized that consistent and responsive caregiving is crucial for a child’s emotional development and long-term personality growth.

Global Research Confirms the Impact

Numerous studies worldwide have confirmed that parents’ phone addiction truly affects their children’s behavior and development—especially in areas like language, focus, and self-regulation:

Study from the Journal of Developmental & Behavioral Pediatrics (2022)

This research found that children whose parents used mobile phones for more than 4 hours a day—especially during time with their kids—were more likely to experience speech delays and emotional regulation issues, such as frequent tantrums or being easily upset.

University of Michigan: Technoference Study

“Technoference” refers to how technology interrupts family relationships. The study found that children raised in households with high levels of technoference showed more aggressive behavior, shorter attention spans, and struggled more with social interactions compared to children in more engaged households.

Guidelines from the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP)

The AAP recommends that parents avoid screen exposure with children under 18 months of age and dedicate at least one hour per day of quality time without electronic devices to support emotional and language development.

Phones Aren’t the Villain—Lack of Eye Contact and Verbal Connection Is

In truth, the phone isn’t the direct enemy. The real problem is the disconnection between parent and child when that attention is constantly pulled away.

Social Referencing: How Children Learn Through Parents’ Facial Expressions

From 6 months to 2 years old, children learn about emotions and safety by “reading” their parents’ faces. When encountering something new—like a big dog, a loud sound, or a stranger—they instinctively look to their parent. If the parent smiles, they feel safe. But if the parent is absorbed in their phone and unresponsive, the child may feel insecure.

Still Face Experiment by Dr. Ed Tronick

In this experiment, mothers were asked to play with their babies, then suddenly go still—no eye contact, no speech, no smile. The babies quickly became distressed, fussy, and tried to get their mother’s attention. When ignored, they eventually turned away and shut down emotionally. This happens every time a parent stares at a screen and neglects vital eye contact and vocal interaction with their child.

The phone itself isn’t harmful. What is harmful is the absence of eye contact, verbal response, and physical connection between parent and child—crucial elements in building trust and healthy development.

Delayed Speech and Short Attention Span in Children: Is It Caused by Parents’ Phone Use or Something Else?

While parents’ phone addiction can indeed be a risk factor affecting a child’s development, it’s not the only one. Speech delays or short attention spans in children can stem from multiple contributing factors, including:

• Genetics: Some children may have a natural predisposition that leads to slower developmental progress.
• Environment: Kids who grow up in quiet households without much verbal interaction or stimulation may also experience delayed development.
• Nutrition: Deficiencies in nutrients like iron, DHA, or vitamin B can affect brain development and functioning.
• Excessive screen time (child’s own): When children are left to watch YouTube or TV for long periods without parental interaction, they may develop passive skills but lack interactive communication abilities.

Speech delays caused by parental phone use often stem from a lack of real-time verbal interaction, which should be happening consistently throughout the day. Hearing language from videos does not replace actual conversations with parents, which involve eye contact and responsive communication.

Parental Habits That May (Unknowingly) Contribute to a Child’s Delayed Speech:

1. Talking to the phone more than the child
   Some parents speak sweetly on TikTok but respond to their child with curt replies like “Not now” or “Later.” This teaches children that their voice may not be as important as the screen.
2. Letting the child watch screens without supplemental conversation
   When cartoons are played during mealtime without any interaction, the child may absorb superficial images and sounds without developing vocabulary depth.
3. Lack of emotional connection cues
   Eye contact, hugging, and smiling while speaking are emotional bridges that help children associate language with love and bonding.
4. Using gadgets to soothe children instead of yourself
   Handing over a phone when a child is fussy—rather than soothing them with words, touch, or cuddles—can teach them to rely on devices to manage emotions.

Warning Signs: When to Seek Professional Advice

Consult a developmental pediatrician if your child:

• Doesn’t respond to their name by age 1
• Has not spoken meaningful words (like “mama” or “ball”) by 18 months
• Cannot form two-syllable phrases (like “want milk” or “eat rice”) by age 2
• Avoids eye contact, doesn’t engage in back-and-forth interactions, or shows no pretend play
• Spends more time with screens than with real people

Early detection and support are key. Don’t hesitate to seek expert help if you’re concerned.

How Can Parents Start Changing Their Habits?

• Set family phone rules: No phones at the dinner table, no screens after 8 PM.
• Spend at least 30 minutes a day of screen-free play with your child: Read stories, sing, or do pretend play to encourage language development.
• Respond every time your child tries to communicate: Whether they point, make sounds, or gesture—acknowledge them immediately.
• Avoid using phones as rewards or behavior control tools: This can create unhealthy screen-related behavior patterns.
• Try the “Pomodoro Parenting” method: Engage fully with your child for 25 minutes, then take a 5-minute break for yourself (like checking your phone), then go back to quality time again.

Raising Kids in a Digital Age Doesn’t Mean Going to Extremes

You don’t have to give up your phone—just use it mindfully:

• Use screens as learning tools: Watch a video together, then ask your child questions about it.
• Model healthy tech use: Show your child that you can put the phone down after use, especially when they’re sharing something with you.
• Schedule shared screen time with clear limits: For example, watch a clip for 30 minutes, then talk about it afterward.

The phone isn’t the enemy—it’s the lack of meaningful interaction that truly affects development. Being “glued to your phone” doesn’t always mean using it all day—it’s about letting it steal precious moments without realizing it.

What children truly need isn’t just good food, a great school, or educational videos. They need loving eye contact, meaningful words, and intentional time shared with parents who are fully present.

Originally published on theAsianparent Thailand