How do you end an affair with a married man?

Oftentimes, we see advice on couples trying to rebuild trust after an affair. But rarely do we see advice about ending an affiar with a married man.

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Being in an affair isn't right. That much is true.

However, it's just as important for people who are engaged in an affair to know what they can do to stop being in an unhealthy relationship,  so that they can end it and move on with their lives.

1. Instead of what they say, look at what they do

Most of the time, your partner will tell you things such as they're planning to leave their marriage, or they are just looking for the right time to leave their wife. And as much as you want to believe them, the fact of the matter is that you're probably the one whom they're going to leave in the end.

Once you start looking at what they do, instead of what they say, it's easier to recognize their intent to just keep you on the hook and keep your relationship going for as long as it's convenient for them.

2. You're only seeing one side of their personality

If you think about it, you're not seeing your partner for who they really are. You're only seeing the side of their personality that they want you to see, and the full spectrum of who they are. You don't know how they really are in different settings, because they're only with you when it's convenient.

Men go into affairs because they think it helps set them free. No kids, no wife, no commitment.

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3. You deserve better

You shouldn't settle for being someone's side piece. You need someone who can give you their full attention and make you feel that you are truly loved.

You deserve to be in a relationship where you don't have to hide behind lies, so that you can be free to be yourself, and to love and be loved in return.

4. Break up with them in person, not online or through a text

To make it easier for you to have closure in your relationship, do it in person, not through a Facebook PM or through a text message.

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Doing it in person helps you deal with emotional baggage, and also lets you get some closure after ending it. It's not the easiest thing to do in the world, but it's something that you need to do.

5. Be straightforward

If you're breaking up with them, say it like you mean it. Don't leave things hanging by saying that, "I hope we can be friends someday," or say "I still love you." Saying those things just makes it hard for you to let go, and makes it easier for them to win you back.

Don't give mixed signals, tell them that you want to break up with them and end the relationship.

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6. Stay strong

The hardest part is not just breaking up, but having the fortitude to not get back together. He might say that he's leaving his family for you, or ask to see you again. Do your best to fight that urge  and just forget about them.

It's important to focus on what's good for you, and what makes you happy. And being in an affair is most definitely not a good place to be in.

Source: yahoo.com

READ: 3 Signs that might mean your spouse is cheating on you

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Written by

Jan Alwyn Batara