Victims of abuse often live with their abusers for years without saying anything, living with the constant threat of physical and emotional harm everyday. Such was the case with Englishwoman Susan Thorpe.
Since being married with her husband Mervyn 30 years ago, her life has become a living nightmare—that was, until he hanged himself in an act of ultimate abuse.
READ: Different types of abusive relationships and how to prevent them
“After she finally stood up to the abuse earlier this year, her 54-year-old husband told her he would hang himself to ‘haunt’ her for the rest of her life,” a report by The Daily Mail said.
“On Valentines’ Day this year, Mr Thorpe sent his wife one last message before going through with his threat and hanging himself at the family home in Odiham, Hampshire.”
The message reads:
I love you forever. Sue, you have broken my heart but it is not your fault, I am going to a better place. Happy Valentines’ Day, I hope we meet again some day.
The police found is body at their family home. Toxicology reports from his autopsy revealed a significant amount of cocaine in his system.
Til death do us part
“I was just fed up with all the verbal abuse and the aggression,” Susan told the inquest. “He would constantly phone when I was out and ask me how long I was going to be, when will I be back home.”
Last summer, Susan had a weekend vacation with her sisters, but that didn’t stop Mervyn from calling her so often that he spoiled her good spirits.
“Afterwards we had an argument and he began arguing with my son as soon as he walked through the door. It was not necessary and he became angry that I defended my son, so he said ‘drop dead you c***.”
READ: My daughter gave me the courage to get out of an abusive relationship
“I wasn’t in love with him anymore and I hadn’t been for a long time. By the end of January I told him I was going to leave.”
He also constantly threatened Susan. On one occasion, he said he’d move in with another woman to make her jealous.
And on another, he told her, “I will make you pay for what you have done to me. I am going to hang myself and you are going to find me and it’s going to haunt you for the rest of your life.”
Out of abuse
At the inquest, Susan confessed that she felt responsible for Mervyn’s death, but coroner Andrew Bradley told her that she could not let herself “live a life under threat.”
Acknowledging that you’re in an abusive relationship is the first step toward solving the problem.
Many women refuse to admit that they are being abused for many reasons, but they have to remember that inflicting harm is never all right, be it in the physical, verbal, or emotional form.
If you think you’re in an abusive relationship, it’s crucial that you talk to someone about it; sharing your burdens helps by making you feel less alone.
From there get in touch with authorities and figure out how you’re going to get out of the relationship before it’s too late.
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