Have you ever experienced na sugurin ng kapitbahay ninyo dahil sa pag-iyak ng inyong baby? Naranasan niyo na bang maipabarangay ng dahil sa inyong anak?
Well, we experienced it this pandemic, it’s really sad and heart breaking. Kaming mag-asawa ay halos tatlong taon ng mag-asawa. Naninirahan kami sa isang compound na kung saan ay attached ang bahay. Walong buwan ang aming anak ng sinugod kami ng aming kapitbahay.
Sinugod kami ng kapitbahay dahil iyak ng iyak si baby
Kakaligo lang ng husband ko nang araw na ‘yon, at kakalabas lang niya ng CR. Naka-towel lang siya, hindi ko maisara ang pinto kasi nga umiiyak si baby kapag tumatayo ako sa crib. So my husband is walking towards the door to close it so that he can dress up nang biglaan kaming sinugod ng aming kapitbahay.
Kaming mag-ina ay nasa loob ng crib. Sumigaw ang kapitbahay saying, “Your son is noisy!”. By the way my husband is a foreigner. Sabi ng asawa ko,
“Can you please get out of our frontage?”
Kasi nga he is wrapped with a towel he felt harrassed kasi pilit siyang kinakausap ng babae naming kapitbahay ng hindi pa siya bihis.
Nung sumugod siya, hindi na naiyak ang baby namin. Our baby is just humming to put himself to sleep while both of us are inside the crib.
Biglang sinabi ng neighbor namin, I am a Filipino this is my country. I will report you to the barangay. By the way friends sila ng barangay at close talaga sila.
Sabi ni husband,
“Feel free to do so. I did nothing wrong to you, my child and my wife are Filipino too, and wherever you want to take this matter to. We will go with you.”
Bawat batang Pilipino ay may karapatan ayon sa batas natin. May karapatan ang anak kong makapaglibang at makapaglaro, karapatan niyang maproteksyunan laban sa karahasan or panganib.
May karapatan siyang maproteksyunan ng pamahalaan at makapagpahayag ng sarili niyang saloobin. At bilang sanggol na hirap pang makapagsalita he can only cry, scream to voice out what he wanted to say and the only way for him to do that is through crying and screaming.
Our compound from the garage.
Hindi naman iyak ng iyak si baby 24/7
Si baby namin ay hindi naman iyak ng iyak ng 24/7. Kapag nag-iingay hindi naman namin pwedeng busalan ang kanyang bibig para lang matahimik ang aming kapitbahay.
Mommies, daddies may I ask you, kapag naiyak ang baby ninyo do you feel happy about it? Can you even rest while your child is crying?
First-time parent kaming mag-asawa, we both know the stress and how difficult it is to raise up a newborn kasi throughout it is only me and my husband who is taking care of our child.
We do not have anyone whom we can rely on to assist us. May I ask, how is it during your first time na mag-alaga ng baby niyo, is it easy?
For us it is not, it is very challenging wala kaming helping hand just my husband and I. We have to sacrifice a lot of things too because of our baby just to make him happy and feel better always at all times.
I have to sacrifice my job just to make sure that our child is well taken care of. Parenthood is really tough, but we have to be stronger for ourselves and our child.
Honestly, I have never seen nor heard such a complaint, ang pinakanakaka-heartbreak it happened in my beloved country. Sabi ni hubby, these are some of the reasons why some foreigners are not happy with Filipinos at times. Because of what they experienced in the Philippines some of them would like to pay back Filipinos who are abroad.
I just hope we all start leaving a good impression on the foreigners who are living with us, in that way we all can live peacefully with our neighbors.
Kinausap pa kami ng homeowners
Back to the story. Firstly, kinausap kami sa homeowners dahil sa issue na ito, hindi na solve nung una kasi sabi niya, she wants us to pack out our loads and leave the place where we are currently residing.
We told them we are not leaving and packing our loads to go anywhere because we did not do anything wrong, secondly ang pag-iyak ng bata ay normal lang.
After giving birth to a child ang iyak ni baby ay isang blessing, it means the baby is alive. It is the nature of the baby to cry and we are doing our best not to let our baby cry, but it’s inevitable.
Gumawa pa siya ng ibang chismis
Paano mo patatahimikin ang bata na hindi maintindihan ang ibig sabihin ng no noise, tahan na, paano ba? When they told her your complains doesn’t have any solid ground, biglaan niyang sinabing binobosohan siya ng asawa ko.
Pati mga taga-homeowners association lito na din sa sinasabi niya kasi ang daming issues na ginagawa niya na walang katuturan. She mentioned my husband is peeping her nasabihan tuloy siya ng asawa ko na we have been neighbors for almost 8 years now, I never liked you nor in my wildest dream approach you.
Now that I am married with a child, will I leave my wife and my child for someone like you who is old and just so you know my wife is far more beautiful than you.
Then sabay hirit ng taga barangay na nakisali sa meeting ng homeowners na wag mong sabihin yan, that’s too harsh! Seriously, too harsh?
Pagbabae nagpaparatang kahit walang solid basis puwede, pero kapag husband ko nagsasabi ng nasa isip niya mali? Anyway, when she is trying to cause confusion between me and my husband, she reminded me of Mrs. Potiphar.
A woman who is ready and willing to destroy people’s lives and destiny. I thank God for His wisdom kasi our relationship as husband and wife is not something superficial that can be broken just by mere words. Our relationship has a solid foundation, if not it is enough to wreck our home.
Maraming bagay na dapat i-complain sa kaniya pero ‘di namin ginawa
We told her right there, we have so many things that we should be complaining about. But because we prefer to live at peace with everyone we don’t complain about it.
When her cats poop, it enters our own house. At times, the mice that she is buying for her cats are entering and destroying our things in the house but never did we complain about it.
Whenever sinusugod siya ng mga asawa ng kinabitan niya at nagwawala sa compound, we did not complained about it. ‘Yong Chinese bamboo niya na nagkakalat sa area namin ng mga dahon at pinamamalagian ng mga lamok. We never complained about it because we want to live at peace with all our neighbors.
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Yung alulod niya na pinarekta niya sa bahay namin, we never complained about it kahit na binabaha ang loob ng bahay naming dahil dun. She did it intentionally ang sabi lang ni husband whatever will not kill you. You don’t complain about it, in that way you can live with everyone peacefully.
Iyak ng iyak si baby kaya umabot sa hearing sa barangay
From homeowners’ association, few weeks after dinala ang case sa barangay. The crazy thing dahil foreigner ang asawa ko wala daw akong right pumasok sa first hearing at discretion lang ng taga barangay kung papapasukin nila ako or hindi, samantalang ang complain ay about my child.
With this it is already biased, I decided to keep quiet about it kasi una sa lahat parepareho tayong Pilipino, what are you displaying to my husband this is how hospitable we are?
This is how nice we are? My dad is there too nung first meeting sa barangay, I wasn’t able to enter at all. Sabi lang ni husband I did not even understand what they are saying they kept on speaking Tagalog, they just told me so many things that are in favor of our neighbor.
Second hearing came, same story but this time around sabi they want na magkaayos. Pinatawag ako, to my surprise they asked me irrelevant questions just to know if I am educated or uneducated.
Even my own Facebook details tinatanong ng punong tagapamayapa. He doesn’t know that not because I have tried to compose myself and to act as civilized as possible it means to say hindi ko alam ang aking rights.
With all the questions he asked me violation ‘yon ng privacy act. He asked me all of my information infront of our neighbor kasi naghahanap sila ng butas just to know if kaladkarin ba ko or edukada.
They told us to write down what we want to have peaceably co-existence she mentioned that if she is outside my husband should stay indoors because he is peeping at her.
My husband said, with due respect why would I look at an old woman who is not even close to the beauty of my wife? We have been neighbors for almost 8 years now.
Why is it now that I am married with a child, why would I have interest in someone who is old, my wife is far younger than you and when I married her she had kept herself pure.
Sabi ng taga barangay bakit ang harsh ng asawa mo? Sabi ko bakit hindi ba harsh yung accusation na namboboso siya? Bakit pagdating sa kapitbahay naming kampingkampi kayo, ang naaapi dito ay yung anak namin, you’re trying to shut him up.
Sabi ng barangay let’s not dwell on the past. Kada may banat kami puro let’s not dwell on the past pero pag may request ang kapitbahay namin, we have to comply?
Pumunta ang barangay sa amin
The barangay came to our compound but they never investigated the issue, according to the neighbors if they will ask them questions about the issue they will speak the truth and stand with us.
Because she is disgracing our race and what she is doing is wrong. Lahat ng may asawa sa buong compound binigyan niya ng same allegation. Foreigner lang si husband kaya naglakas loob siyang ipabarangay kami.
I would like to take this opportunity also to thank our neighbors who truly loved us and showed concern about us and our child. Thank you for being there for us to advise us.
The lessons I want to share
In writing this today made me realized that enough is enough. Hindi ako papayag na maranasan pa ng kahit sino ang pinaranas sa amin ng aming kapitbahay.
Ayokong may maging another child pa na magiging victim ng pagiging bias ng barangay. I will exercise the right of my child and I will fight for his rights.
I am advised to request from DILG ng BPO nung una ayoko, kasi gusto kong ipagpasa Diyos na lang. But writing this article and reminding of my baby’s right. I guess I have to request for a Barangay Protection Order para lang hindi na kami sugurin pa specially may baby kami.
Para na rin magsilbing example sa mga taga Local Government Unit dito sa amin na hindi dapat nila tinotolerate ang nonsense complaints at dapat patas sila.
Gusto ko paglaki ng aking anak ma-exercise niya lahat ng mga Karapatan niya, hindi ako papayag na mabully siya ng kahit sino ng dahil lang sa biracial baby siya.
I want him to know he has a voice and his voice matters. I want him to know that he has his own rights bilang batang Pilipino. Not because his father is a foreigner he is no longer a citizen of this country.
He belongs here and he has the same right as others. If I will not stand up for my child in my own country who will? If my husband will be the one to fight for his rights, he will only be demoralized and harassed!
I will not let this Christmas and New Year pass without the Barangay Protection Order for my child but my husband told me pamasko na natin ito sa kanya.
We just need to show her compassion, people like this could be someone who has depression or she might be psychotic. She is hearing what no one has told her.
For Jesus who is the reason for this season, we have decided to let this one slide but if it happens again I am not letting it slide anymore, enough is enough.
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