What makes a marriage destined to last forever? Is it the romance that never fades? Is it being a perfect match and agreeing on everything?
According to experts, lasting marriages aren’t driven by fleeting emotions, but rather a sure, steady foundation of love and commitment.
Here are attributes that psychologists and therapists believe make a marriage fail proof.
Mutual respect
In order for a relationship to stand the test of time, you should genuinely respect one another. There will be times in life that you will be tested, times when you don’t necessarily ‘like’ one another, but if the respect is always there, it’ll be easier for you to restore your relationship during rough times.
Open communication
Experts cannot stress this enough. Communicating honestly and effectively is one of the most important ingredients of a strong marriage. This doesn’t mean that you agree 24/7, but that you’re both mature enough to talk things out, to agree to disagree, and to be genuinely good listeners.
Fun and Laughter
They say you should only settle down with someone who makes you laugh, and there is much truth to this. You’re in it for the long haul, after all, so choosing to find the fun in everyday experiences and having a sense of humour despite life’s challenges makes the journey easier and more enjoyable.
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Service
The best couples care for one another deeply. They’re no longer looking out for their best interests alone; they now think of how each decision will affect their partner. They are willing to go above and beyond to care for their partner and to make sure they have what they need. A healthy marriage thrives on constant selfless giving and acts of devotion.
Trust
You can’t spend a lifetime with someone without trusting them implicitly and without hesitation. If you feel you need to trust your partner more, you can commit to doing daily exercises to nurture it in your relationship. Trust isn’t something that just magically appears, it’s built over time, so don’t worry if you feel you are lacking in this department. You have a lifetime together, after all.
Acceptance
Loving someone means embracing who they are—warts and all. Most of us bring baggage and past issues into relationships, but strong couples know that none of that matters, because they believe love and acceptance go hand in hand. Your partner may have quirks or behavior that annoys you, but your love for them helps you look past all that.
Gratitude
It’s important to show appreciation for all that your spouse does for you. The most bonded couples know that showing your spouse you value them is vital to making a marriage work. Make a habit of saying ‘thank you’ or ‘I appreciate you’ to your spouse each day.
Aligned priorities
Your spouse is your life partner, so your vision and priorities must be in tune, in order to make the journey easier and meaningful. Life will throw you many surprise trials, that much is expected, but having a spouse by your side who shares and supports your dreams and values, will help you face whatever comes.
READ: 6 behaviors that people in happy marriages try to avoid
sources: Family Share, Focus on the Family, Marriage.com