In his farewell address, Obama had an incredibly emotional moment when he spoke of his daughters. "Of all that I've done in my life, I'm most proud to be your dad" he said. And indeed he would be for they have grown up to be two fine women. If you're wondering how that happened, here is what Michelle Obama parenting is all about.
About Malia and Sasha
Obama describes them as such:
Malia and Sasha, under the strangest of circumstances, you have become two amazing young women, smart and beautiful, but more importantly, kind and thoughtful and full of passion. You wore the burden of years in the spotlight so easily."
19-year-old Malia Obama is currently attending Harvard University as a freshman while Sasha Obama is finishing high school at Sidwell Friend's School. That is where Chelsea Clinton attended school as the first daughter.
Michelle Obama Parenting Style
Michelle Obama parenting is all about raising independent, well-meaning, kind and compassionate people. She instilled these traits in her daughters from a young age while giving them the space and opportunity to learn the tough lessons in life.
Michelle Obama parenting - Do not be overprotective
"Sometimes we treat our children too preciously because of the issues they've dealt with. Barack and I, we thought about with Malia and Sasha, OK, we could've spent eight years feeling sorry for them that they are living in a bubble that every misstep for them would be on YouTube, that they didn't have access to their father in a way," she said.
They were also concerned about their children's privacy.
We could've felt bad for them, and there would've been a truth there. But our view was this is their life, and we can't apologise for the life they have because a whole lot of it is good.
When asked how she raised such well-adjusted daughters, Michelle Obama said, "I can't cherish you to death. We have to raise our children to be the adults that we want them to be, and that starts young. You can't be so afraid that life will break them that you don't prepare them for life."
Sometimes our fear keeps us from pushing our kids out into the cold cruel world. And then they're not ready and we wonder why.
I think this is something many Singapore parents are guilty of. We tend to be overprotective and would bubblewrap our children if we could, to protect them from the ills and the evils of the world. But we can learn from the Michelle Obama parenting model, that we must let go and let them learn the ropes.
Gender Inequalities
Michelle Obama feels that the reason behind many grown men abusing their privilege is that we raise our boys and girls different. We take care not to hurt men, and that comes with a price.
"Are we protecting our men too much, so they feel a entitled? And a little, you know, a little self-righteous sometimes, but that's kind of on us too, as women and mothers as we nurture men and push girls to be perfect."
Again this applies to us as well. Asian parents in general, often have different standards when it comes to parenting boys and girls. Moms, maybe we need to reflect on whether we are raising our boys to be ready to head a family and look after their wives, or are we doting on them a tad bit too much?
Michelle Obama also pointed out that women find more support and self-reflection in their friendships than men.
"Women, we do it better than men. I'm, you know, sad for you guys. Ya'll should get you some friends and talk to each other. Ya'll need to go talk to each other about your stuff because there's so much of it. It's so messy."
And that's really true isn't it? Moms find so much of comfort and support in fellow moms as opposed to men who may have their buddies, but they don't really turn to each other for emotional support. Often they find it difficult to even truly open up about their problems!
So there you go moms, Michelle Obama parenting tips! In a nutshell, it's all about instilling the right values in our children from a young age, not making excuses for them, making them cherish what they have, and most importantly, not trying to control and protect them too much.
Guide your children through life but don't live it for them!
Source: W Magazine
Republished with permission from: theAsianParent Singapore