Today marks the 10th anniversary of our marriage. I decided to write to you because I believe it will somehow ease the pain and bitterness I feel every waking moment. I’d also like to remind you of where you stand. I will make this day also memorable for you. Today, I will explicitly express that you don’t have the right to destroy my family, that you will never win my husband’s heart and I’m not giving up on him.
You have nothing. You are living for stolen moments behind closed doors and you are desperately hoping that it will add up to something real because in your mind, they have. But in reality, they never will. Because stolen moments is not a life.
I was devastated when I found out you were having an affair with my husband. It was a real nightmare. The pain was indescribable. But I chose to forgive him. I chose to stay even if it hurts. Because it already happened and there’s nothing I can do to change it.
For my own peace of mind and as a part of my healing, I politely asked my husband that I talk to you for closure, like I told you. God knows how much courage and calm it took me to face the monster that I shared my husband with for almost 2 years unknowingly. And true to my word, I never did you any trouble. It took everything the best I could. I did try to understand everything you told me. But your words never matched your actions. I know you have fallen hard for my husband.
There is nothing romantic about an illicit affair. It destroys lives, families, futures and relationships. You should know this because you were also cheated on by your own husband…
You know it is wonderful to find someone to love who loves you in return. But it should not be at the expense of others. There is nothing romantic about an illicit affair. It destroys lives, families, futures and relationships. You should know this because you were also cheated on by your own husband. You have been cheated on but that doesn’t mean you are licensed to cheat. If your husband destroyed your family, you shouldn’t take it as a reason to wreck someone’s family.
Wrecking a family is not something to be proud of. Know that what you reap, you sow.
You have children of your own. Is being a mistress and a homewrecker the legacy you want to pass on to them? Is that the image you want them to remember you by?
I believe my husband is a good man. In his heart, he still chose his family, not because it is the right thing to do, but it is us he truly loves. You are disillusioned if you were expecting he would leave us for you. Realize that the moment you decided to get involved with a married man, expect heartaches in the end, not happy endings.
I believe my husband is a good man. In his heart, he still chose his family, not because it is the right thing to do, but it is us he truly loves. You are disillusioned if you were expecting he would leave us for you…
You may say that you were the one who stood by him during hard times (because I was miles away) emotionally, at times that my husband and I had trying moments, and of course, physically, so you could help him “release” his stress and temporarily “ease his pain.”
Just because I was away, you led him to a fantasy where he could forget his wife for a few moments. But did you honestly believe that my husband would totally forget about me? That he fell for you? Did you really believe he would choose you over me? Wake up.
When I confronted my husband about your affair, I told him I was really insulted. Because my husband has real standards when it comes to women. You took advantage of his gambling problem, by providing for him financially. You gave him everything, even taking your 3 kids for granted, as your mom told me. You were expecting my husband to appreciate your effort and fall for you.
But, honestly, everything you did for him is nothing compared to what I’ve endured over the past decade of marriage. So don’t get your hopes up. Did you really think you were the only other woman he slept with? He told me that there were others.
Remember when I asked you if you knew? It’s because we were both diagnosed with STDs. I suggest you get yourself checked, too.
You told me you helped my husband deal with his gambling problem? Thanks, but don’t expect it will justify the betrayal.
You have to live with the fact that my husband will never be yours…
You’ve been telling me that you were sorry and the affair has ended (of course, it’s because I found out). You even asked me if you became friends since you started out that way, are you for real? Of course not.
If you feel that you have been used to gratify my husband’s needs, you have to admit that you were a willing partner. You knew from the start that he was a married man. You can’t blame anybody, not even my husband for your pain. That was your choice. Live with it. And if there’s someone who should be mad and pissed, it should be me.
Know that being a mistress doesn’t make you win. It makes you lose your self-esteem, values, and character. You never got love. You only gained lies, deceit and stolen affections that did not belong to you.
You have to live with the fact that my husband will never be yours. That’s the price you have to pay for being my husband’s infamous mistress. Since you crossed that line for the nth time, I’m done being nice to you, know that I’m never backing down.
This letter was sent in by one of our readers, who has requested to remain anonymous.
READ: 10 Signs your husband is cheating, according to a former mistress
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