Are you and your spouse constantly fighting because of your parenting differences? Here are some tips on handling parenting disputes with your spouse!
1. When you're fighting due to stress caused by a new baby
Having a newborn is amazing, but it involves a lot of hard work, sleepless nights, and stress. This stress can sometimes put both you and your spouse on edge, so minor arguments can suddenly turn very explosive.
If you find this happening to you, then you need to find the time to both relax as a couple. A good way of going about it would be to look for a babysitter such as a close family friend or relative, to take care of your newborn even for just a night. While you and your spouse can just relax and bring down the stress levels.
It's also helpful to get a nanny to help take care of your baby so that you can get some sleep instead of constantly waking up to take care of your newborn.
2. When you're fighting because of different opinions
Even if you have a lot of things in common with your spouse, having different opinions is inevitable, especially when it comes to being a parent.
Your husband might be more stern or strict when it comes to your kids, while you might be more relaxed and lenient. And this can sometimes cause fights when both of you have clashing opinions when it comes to your kids.
A good way of dealing with this is to find a way to compromise. Remember, you're not competing with your spouse, both of you are parents, and you both have the same goal of making sure that your kids are safe, happy, and grow up well.
3. When you both have different approaches to discipline
When it comes to discipline, fights usually happen because one of you might think that stricter forms of discipline, such as shouting, or even corporal punishment is better than talking to your child and addressing the problem with them calmly.
If that's the case, it's very important to talk with your spouse to make sure that you're both on the same page. Nowadays, a balance between being a strict and a relaxed parent is important so that your child knows the value of discipline, as well as the importance of being understood and listened to. Sometimes kids act out not because they're 'bad', but because they want your attention.
Sometimes kids act out not because they're 'bad', but because they want your attention. In cases like that, a more relaxed and understanding approach is needed. However, if your child starts to slack on their schoolwork, then a bit of strict parenting might be in order.
4. When you fight because you feel undermined as a parent
Does your spouse sometimes break the rules that you set for your kids? Such as when you tell your kids, "no sweets until dinnertime" but your husband sneaks them some cookies or a similar treat.
These situations can sometimes escalate to big fights since it's not a good thing for your spouse to undermine your authority since it shows your kids that the rules you set can be broken, and thus it can make them think that it's okay to disobey you.
In these situations, you need to talk to your spouse and discuss the rules in your home, so that the both of you are on the same page. Remember, consistency is key, so it's important that the both of you both agree on a rule or a decision when it comes to certain situations regarding your children.