10 Questions you need to consider before you have a baby
If you and your spouse are planning on starting a family, make sure you consider these 14 questions first to know if you're ready!
Having a baby entails a lot of planning and making sure that you're ready for the responsibility.
1. How do you end your arguments?
Fun fact: Having arguments or fights in your relationship doesn't necessarily mean that some things are not working, it's all about how you resolve your problems and get to a solution afterwards.
If you tend to end your fights with the both of you still angry at each other, or if you hold grudges against your spouse, then you might want to fix those first before having a baby. Having a baby means that you'll face more challenges, and the both of you need to be mentally prepared to work on those challenges as a team, and not as enemies.
2. Do you understand the responsibilities being a parent entails?
Before having a child, it's important to talk with your partner and understand what it really means to be a parent. You need to know the responsibilities that parents have, and you and your spouse have to be sure that the both of you are ready for that kind of responsibility in your lives.
Having a baby means you'll have a human life in your hands, and you need to understand the magnitude of that decision if you choose to have a baby.
3. Are you fine with going out of your comfort zone?
Having a baby will push you and your spouse way out of your comfort zones. From giving birth, changing diapers, taking care of your baby if he or she gets sick, etc., you'll be faced with a lot of new experiences that might shock you and push you out of your comfort zones.
It's important for you and your spouse to have the mindset that you'll constantly be learning new things, and probably failing at some aspects of being a parent. It's all a part of the experience!
4. Do you laugh often?
Learning to laugh at your own mistakes and seeing the bright side of things is very important when you're already a parent. It helps you cope with the stress of taking care of a baby, and lets you see the beauty even in difficult situations.
5. Are your relatives ready?
It's also important to consider how your relatives will respond to you having a baby. It's important to have an extended family that will be able to support your child, as well as people that you can turn to whenever you need help taking care of your child.
6. Will the both of you be working, or will one of you stay at home?
You need to discuss what setup you want for your family. If the both of you still want to focus on your careers even after having a baby, then you'll need to hire a nanny that can be trusted to take care of your child. Of course, this also means that you can't work overtime constantly, since your child also needs to be with you.
Choosing to stay at home on the other hand, entails a lot of sacrifice. If you or your spouse choose to do so, you need to be aware that most of the time, you'll do everything on your own, and it's a lot of hard work and sleepless nights, so be ready to take on that responsibility.
7. Can you make time for yourselves?
Even if your child is important in your lives, your relationship as a couple is just as important. You need to understand that making time for each other helps keep your family bond strong.
That's why you need to still make time for yourselves as a couple even if you already have a child.
8. How will you handle discipline?
Teaching your child discipline is very important. That's why you need to have a discussion with your spouse about how you'll handle things if your child misbehaves.
Both of you have to be on the same page when it comes to your parenting style, so that your child won't get mixed signals or become confused.
9. How will you share your responsibilities?
Even if one of you will stay at home, or if the both of you will be working, it's important to establish how you'll share responsibilities with your spouse.
All the housework should be equally shared, same with taking care of the baby. It's important to be fair and considerate of your spouse, especially if they're the one who usually takes cafe of your child.
10. Are you financially ready?
Having a child is expensive. The financial responsibility that comes with having a baby is almost as big as the actual responsibility of taking care of a child.
It's important to ensure that you and your spouse are financially ready when you decide to have a baby since having a child is very expensive. Of course, you don't need to be millionaires to take care of a child, but at the very least you should be able to provide for your child's basic needs.
You'll also need to save up for your child's education, so being responsible with your money is also an important trait to have. If you and your spouse are the type of couple who spends without considering the consequences, then you might want to change your spending habits to make better decisions when it comes to where you spend your money.
Investing in an educational plan for your child early on is also a good idea, as it can help you save a lot of money later on when your child is already studying.
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