Though marriage is filled with wonderful moments, there will be tough times; times when you feel like you can’t see eye to eye or you argue so much that you fear you won’t make it through.
The key to moving past the rough patches is taking it one day at a time and knowing that even the simplest gestures can make a world of difference.
During the difficult times, it’s easy to just distance yourself and avoid having a conversation about it. But it’s during these trying times that you should speak up, to show your partner you’re still willing to make it work.
If you’re at a loss for words when going through trials, here are a few things you can start with!
1. How can I help you?
Ask your partner how you can make their day better. Do so in a loving way, in the spirit of serving and fulfilling their needs when you see that they’re so overwhelmed. For parents, it can be as simple as taking over diaper changing duties for the day.
2. We will get through this
There will be times when your partner just wants to give up or lose hope. During these times, it would greatly help for you to remind them that you are a team! Use the word ‘We’ often to remind them that their problems are not theirs alone to bear.
3. I truly care for you
Though this can be communicated through loving actions and gestures, sometimes you just need to flat out tell your partner. When problems get so overwhelming, they may find it difficult to notice the little, sweet things you do for them to remind them you care.
photo: pexels
4. “Remember when…”
Reminiscing about happy times can help you look forward–and believe–that they’ll come again. Taking a trip down memory lane can motivate you both to push past the bumps in the road on your journey past the tough times in life.
5. I need your help
Being needed shows your partner they are valued. It is also a way of humbling yourself. You can’t do all of this alone. Again, you are a team. Make sure to reach out, not just to make your spouse feel good, but to also help ease whatever burden you’ve been carrying.
6. I’m sorry
Nothing makes the difficult times worse than holding onto your pride when you’ve hurt or humiliated your spouse. Don’t be above saying you’re sorry. Resolving conflicts in a loving way will make the tough times easier.
7. I’m proud to be married to you
Build your spouse up by reminding them you take pride in having them by your side. Praise them often, in front of your kids, friends, and family.
8. I’m willing to do whatever it takes
Tell your spouse that, come what may, you’re sticking with them. You’re willing to work things out. These tough times are no match for couples who are committed to one another and to making their relationship work through anything and everything!
sources: Family Share, Babble, Redbook
READ: Why the ‘ugly parts’ of life make a marriage even more beautiful