With over 8 months in quarantine, you’d think that this meant more time to get intimate with your partner. But let’s get real—with day-to-day responsibilities like household chores, taking care of your kids, work, and tons more stuff to do, chances are, you’re too tired for sexy time. Sexy time, getting down and dirty, getting busy, and the highly popular Netflix and Chill… there are many euphemisms for doing the deed. But let’s not sugarcoat it. Sex is sex. Beyond procreation, it’s meant to be fun—spicy, even. And even with kids in the equation, your sex life doesn’t have to suffer.
Here’s how to keep things going:
1. Bring Out the Lingerie
Insecure about cellulite, those stretch marks, and how your body doesn’t look the same as it did before? Don’t be! Everyone’s beautiful, inside and out. And nothing says confidence like embracing everything about your body, curves and all. Since people are visual creatures (so is your partner, for sure!), suit up and wear that lingerie you’ve been eyeing. Not only is it an added boost of confidence, but it’s guaranteed to spice things up a notch.
2. Switch Up the Foreplay
Foreplay sets the mood for what’s to come (pun intended) and there are just so many possibilities! From playing with food to oil massages, talking dirty, slow dancing, and teasing your partner among other things, foreplay gets your body excited. Especially since sex is just as much a mental act as it is physical.
Tip: If you do plan on venturing into food foreplay (foodplay), sweets are fine and dandy, but use spicy food with caution—that stuff burns!
3. Put Sexy Time on the Schedule
Most people would say to be spontaneous—perhaps for the thrill of it or because it’s fun. But surprisingly, scheduling sex is a great way to encourage a healthy sex life. When it’s up on the calendar for certain days or times, you and your partner will have something to look forward to, even after a long and tiring day. Plus, reminding each other (in code, so the kids won’t know) builds up the anticipation and gets you both excited.
They do call it sexy time for a reason, after all.
4. Bring Out the Toys
Who says that toys are for kids only? Even adults have their share of toys and let me tell you—they’re more for just solo play. Take the time to either surprise your partner with a new toy to spice things up or you can even shop with your partner and find something you both like. Not only is this a great tool (literally!) for changing things up, but it lets you get creative, too. And nothing says fun in the bed than some toys to keep you both busy. Wink, wink.
5. Quickie or Slow… i.e. Both are Okay!
Sex doesn’t always have to feature rose petals, low candlelight, and that saxophone solo from “Careless Whisper.” In fact, with kids who can barge in any time, quickies are an option to get frisky… fast! Not only is the brief spontaneity exciting, but it’s a way to pass the time (or keep busy) while the kids are occupied. And just as fast sex is fun, slow, drawn-out sex is exciting since you get to savor each and every little moment and little detail.
Quick, slow… anything will do as long as you get some action.
But with great sex comes great responsibility. If you #DoItRight, you don’t need to worry about the risk it comes with. These include unexpected pregnancies, unwanted STIs, and the like. This is especially relevant now that we’re in the midst of a pandemic. Anxiety and worries about the future are everywhere, but there are things you can still control, like the risk of an unexpected pregnancy. More than ever, being safe and responsible sex is a key part of life now. Thus, it is important for you and your partner to keep an open mind, respect each other’s desires, and most importantly: to use the proper contraceptives. Doing it right means equipping yourself with knowledge (education), being responsible (practicing safe sex) and using the right contraceptives. Always affordable, available, and easy to buy, no matter which method you choose, TRUST RH Choices makes it easy for you to Do It Right!
Beyond pleasure and procreating, safe and responsible sex is natural, healthy, and totally human, and is meant to empower everyone to be confident about his or her bodies and to be an expression of love. Explore more topics on sexual and reproductive health on www.DoItRight.ph and follow its Facebook page www.facebook.com/DoItRightPH.