Pregnancy can not only be tough on the woman, but her partner too.
And as one husband recently vented, some pregnant women can become ‘overly aggressive’.
Taking to reddit to share his experience and to get other’s feedback on whether he was wrong for feeling like he did, the husband detailed his wife’s behaviour which included slamming doors, huffing and puffing and getting annoyed at the smallest of things.
Wife’s anger during pregnancy: “She gets mad”
“Over the last 6-8 weeks, she has become more-short fused. If I’m trying to talk to her and our toddler is interrupting, she gets mad at me for taking too long to say what I need to say.
“If something small isn’t working to her satisfaction (the irritation of trying to thread a needle unsuccessfully; a dish slipping a bit when you’re trying to wash it) she starts angrily cussing at it,” he confesses.
“She slams doors and walks around huffing and puffing. If I say anything about it, I get accused of being in a panic or losing my sh**,” he adds.
“She feels like she carries the burden”
The husband went on to explain that he’s currently working six days a week and wakes up at 4am and doesn’t get home until after 5pm.
“I also go to school part time. In between, I’m doing the standard and expected fatherly/husbandly things. I do everything I can to bear as much of the burden as I can humanly bear so things run as smoothly as possible, while we continue to make strides to get ahead. I’m not an uninvolved out of touch participant in my family,” he adds.
“Last night, we were discussing some of the finer points of this particular situation. It was just a conversation, nothing volatile. But, she said she feels like she carries about 70% of the burden for the household. Imagine my WTF face after getting home 13 hours after I left,” he exclaimed.
“I feel like she’s the star of the show”
The begrudged husband then explained that although they will probably work through their issues, he wishes that her life did not take centre show.
“She is experiencing more than I can understand, so whatever else I’m doing on my end is certainly what little I can do to try to match that. It’s just hard not to feel like I’m background noise sometimes in a world where she is the star of the show,” he added.
“It’s her hormones”
Users were generally sympathetic towards the dad, explaining that it could be her hormones.
“My immediate thought has been pregnancy hormones. My wife tends to be zero bullsh*t with a lot, but it’s the fuse that isn’t normal. Even when I mention it, she thinks it’s me, when I could have just been standing in the room with my mouth shut the whole time. It’s all not normal.
“She’s five months along and this is happening, my thoughts tend to go to hormones, which is why I give her as much credit as possible. It doesn’t stop it from being exhausting,” he explained.
“Like I said, I’ll keep working hard. I’ve started trying to add 20 minutes to my morning so I can get ready for work and handle her morning tasks as well.”
“What’s her mental load like?”
Another user suggested that he should check in with what was currently on his wife’s plate.
“You may be doing the physical, but what is the mental load like? Is she responsible for remembering doctor’s appointments, birthdays, holidays, taking note of what supplies you’re running low on, compiling the grocery list, going grocery shopping, planning meals, pets (if applicable) and finances,” she asked.
“Because even though my husband is much more active at home than his father ever was, I’m still responsible for 100% of the above tasks, 50% of the physical house work, working my full-time job, and completing grad school. Mental load is real, guys, and it’s exhausting without being pregnant and with a child,” she added.
What do you think? Is the husband right to feel upset or should he just understand that pregnancy is hard work?
This article was republished with permission from KidSpot.
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Republished with permission from theAsianparent Singapore
Basahin: Dahil sa galit sa mister, misis itinapon ang anak sa bintana!