Some people say that jealousy in a relationship is normal, or even good—jealousy shows that you care, right? That’s a very glass-half-full way of looking at things, but in reality, jealousy can consume you and in the long run, can ruin your once-healthy relationship.
One theAsianparent Community user shared a quote from life coach Ali Gui:
Here’s what the rest of the theAsianparent Community community had to say about jealousy.
Jealousy is the symptom of a bigger problem
Jealousy doesn’t spring out of nowhere. “There are other underlying reasons (e.g., insecurity, feeling neglected or unappreciated, feeling threatened) that bring about the feeling of being jealous,” wrote Hui Q.N. “It is more important to address those issues to maintain a healthy relationship.”
It’s normal, but you shouldn’t entertain it
“Yes, you need to preserve whats important and learn to deal with negative emotions,” Roshni C. responded. “Jealousy is always a problem. If I see someone talking closely with my spouse with hands touching his arm or shoulder, it hits a nerve. But I know and I trust that at the end of the day he’s by my side. Trust and everything will be okay. Make jealousy a joke.”
On the next page: Building your relationship on trust and learning to think the best of your partner.
Build your relationship on trust
To avoid jealousy in a relationship, learn how to trust your partner. Being overly suspicious and second-guessing your partner’s every move shows them that you don’t think they’re trustworthy, driving them away.
“I build our relationship based on trust,” Febby A wrote. “I don’t have to snoop on his phone when he’s asleep. I don’t have to know his social media password to stalk who he has been talking to. And 10 years of togetherness, based on trust, respect, and willingness to get along with his friends, we never had jealousy problems.”
Photo: Dreamstime
You should think the best of your partner
A relationship won’t work if you think negatively of your partner. By refusing to entertain jealous thoughts, you’re showing them that you respect their character.
“I would honestly say that jealous has never been an issue for me,” Nooraini D. responded. “I feel that girls can try to flirt with my partner but if he truly loves me, he should know what he has to do. If my partner has to work with female colleagues all the time, he should know where to draw the line.”
READ: Quiz: Do you have a healthy relationship?
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