Being a single mom is an uneasy affair; the term itself carries a certain stigma. It becomes even more difficult on that day every year when the spotlight is put on mothers all over the world.
During Mother’s Day, where do single mothers fit, and how?
In Heather Rahn’s Scary Mommy story, she explores her experiences during her first mother’s day as a single mother.
When someone asked her what she wanted for the day, she laughed. The one thing she wanted more than anything else was to have one day to sleep in—until noon.
“I’ve gone through four Mother’s Days as an unofficial mom,” she admitted. “Three after or during my first failed pregnancies, and then last year, when I knew I was pregnant but no one else did.
“But this time, after those four Mother’s Days, I get to be included.”
For Mother’s Day she won’t be able to sleep in, won’t be able go through the day without doing the dishes or laundry, won’t get flowers, or breakfast in bed, or a day off.
After all, it was just her and her daughter.
But she didn’t want anyone to feel sorry of her, or for people to pity her. Because despite being a single mother, she got to wake up and pick up her baby from the crib.
“I get to kiss her right where her neck meets her cheeks, which she loves.”
“I get to cuddle her while she drinks her morning bottle and watches Mickey Mouse.”
“I get to lay her on the couch, and lean in while she rubs her hands on my face (this is new and it kills me).”
“I get to pick out her clothes for the day and get her dressed.”
“I get to pick out bows and shoes for her to wear.”
“I get to put her in her car seat and take her with me to my mom’s to celebrate my very first official Mother’s Day.
"I get to do all of that. ME.
"This is what I have been waiting for. I feel complete. I feel like I finally found my reason for being here I am happy, and I am so completely in love that there are days I can’t even handle it."
On Mother’s day, Heather said, she’d look fondly back at her daughter’s birth, remember her first cry, remember touching her face as soon as she was born and holding her and looking at that sweet, scrunched up face.
“I am so so so grateful. So blessed. So happy. So complete. So rich. So loved. I mean…how does it ever get any better than this?”
READ: Tips for a single mom: How to budget and save your money
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