The advantages and disadvantages of raising a child without grandparents
Don’t worry, you and hubby can handle it!
Some of us have really great memories of growing up with our grandparents. They would come over every weekend and play with us or take us out. Others may remember only seeing their grandparents during festive holidays. Others may not have even met their grandparents. Whatever the case is, raising a child without grandparents – whether it’s because they live really far away, they are estranged or passed away, is the reality of some parents.
Even if families get together often, it’s not the same as having your parents living across the street obsessed over your babies all the time. But even though there are downsides for your kids not have their grandparents around, there are actually some benefits too.
5 things that happen when you are raising a child without grandparents:
1. You have to hire a nanny or babysitter whenever you want to go out together as a couple!
Most grandparents will be fawning over their grandchildren without question. So for grandparents who live around the corner, it’s like having a babysitter at a moments notice – for free. But if your parents live far away, then you’ll have to schedule a babysitter just to get an evening date with your husband.
On the bright side, family gatherings are filled with joy and laughter because it’s rare for your grandparents to have a chance to play with your kids.
2. Your parents might have to miss out on important events
It’s not easy to get everyone together when baby takes his first steps or says his first word. But it’s sad to think how difficult it will be to invite your parents for baby’s first preschool concert performance knowing that they live halfway across the world. Smartphones are helping to bridge the gap closer, but it doesn’t beat the real thing.
Conversely, you might also be missing out on important events like friends’ birthday parties and weddings because you are unable to find a sitter for the night. But thankfully the disadvantages kind of end there!
3. You get to start your own traditions
With you and hubby living far away from each of your parents, the two of you have the choice to carve your own family traditions. Your children will be happy with new “instant traditions” unique to your family. For example, opening Christmas presents in the morning rather than doing it at midnight when they’re sleepy and cranky.
You and hubby have the freedom of choice to make your own decisions, and as you grow together as a family, new traditions will come to be.
4. Your kids will appreciate their grandparents more
It’s more special when your children’s grandparents come over to visit, when they live far away. They want to be as close to their grandchildren as possible, and take up every minute possible to fuss over them. It becomes all the more special, and your children will be looking forward to spending time with their Nana and Papa. Your family will cherish your parents better.
When it’s difficult for your family to come visit often, then it’s down to your close friends, other relatives and even mum groups for the save – helping you on your parental journey. Some of these people will have a heart of gold and will be generous to help you whenever you need it. As you raise your children, you’ll come to know who you can trust when you reach out for assistance.
Grandparents are great at spoiling our children. They have already done the hard job of raising us and now that they’ve become grandparents, they will want to give their grandkids the best, but this might result in your child becoming super spoilt! But one of the advantages of raising a child without grandparents is that they might turn out less spoilt!
Republished with permission from: theAsianParent Singapore