Just because it didn't work out between you and your spouse, it doesn't mean you can no longer be role models for your kids when it comes to what real love looks like.
Here's some ways you can still teach your kids about loving relationships as a single parent.
1. Choosing to be alone instead of being in an unhappy relationship teaches them about self-respect
When they see how you've tried to make it work, but only ended up fighting daily, they'll see how you valued yourself enough to get out of a toxic relationship. It helps them form an early concept of self-respect, valuing themselves at an early age. This helps them raise their expectations and standards when it comes to their future relationships, be it romantic or otherwise.
2. It teaches them to be independent
Having to split time between two households teaches kids the value of quality time. It also makes them more self-sufficient, when it comes to dealing with emotions as well as doing household chores. There will be times when they'll be left alone. This could also be an opportunity for them to build their self-esteem, knowing that they are entrusted with some responsibility at a young age.
Being independent is an amazing trait to have as they grow because it encourages them to pursue healthy relationships that aren't co-dependent or abusive.
3. They learn how to resolve conflict
If you fight the right way, your kids can see that there is a mature way to solve problems. Just because you no longer have feelings for each other, it doesn't mean the respect should go out the window. Seeing that you still care for one another despite all the hurt or heartbreak will inspire them to establish relationships that are built on mutual trust and respect when they grow up.
4. They learn the importance of resilience
Through dealing with having separated parents, they learn to manage overwhelming emotions. They learn to open up, communicate, and to develop coping mechanisms that will make them stronger as they grow up. It will make it easier for them to adapt to massive life changes in the future.
5. They practice compassion
Going through something as heavy as their parents separating makes them more caring and considerate of peers who are going through the same thing. Empathy towards their parents is also developed.
Though no one wants to be in this situation, it's a reality of life. Though you weren't able to work things out no matter how hard you tried, rest assured that you're not a failure as a parent and you can still raise kids with a genuinely healthy view of love and relationships.
sources: YourTango.com, Kid's Health, Canadian Living
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