As a parent, you want to give your child every possible opportunity in life. You want them to have the advantages and resources you might not have had when you were growing up. But how can you tell that you’re not raising a spoiled kid? Is there a limit to what you should give your kids?
First, you must ask yourself if you are not setting any limits for them. If you’re easily manipulated by their every whim or if you cave and give them whatever they want just to calm them down when they’re having a tantrum, then perhaps it’s time to rethink what limits you are setting for them.
Do not balk under pressure
According to Baby Center, it’s important to set clear, age-appropriate limits. For school-aged kids, letting them work for things and letting them explain their needs can help them become more disciplined and hone their communication skills. Why should you let them play a computer game? Will they be able to clean their room and do certain chores beforehand? Make sure they learn responsibility by doing things as simple as putting their toys away before engaging in leisurely activities.
Let them be disappointed
Don’t be afraid to disappoint them. Frustrating your child does not make you a bad parent. It means you want what is best for them. It also helps them find ways to manage stress and help them grow into a more well-adjusted adult.
Do not compromise rules
House rules are house rules. Showing them you will not compromise because they are begging or throwing a tantrum reinforces respect. If you give in to what they want because they’re throwing a fit, they might learn that crying or yelling is the best way to get their way.
Manage meltdowns calmly
If you are at home and your child has a meltdown, try ignoring it until they finish. When in public, out of courtesy for others, take your child away from the crowd or lead them back into your car or quiet corner where they can get over their tantrum on their own.
Talk calmly to them and try to distract them, but avoid giving in to their every request or promising material rewards for good behavior, as this just might encourage more tantrums in the future.
Parenting is a journey of learning and growth. Just because your child seems to be heading down the “spoiled” path doesn’t mean you can’t unspoil them. It does not mean you are a bad parent. All parents have points of improvement worth working on. Grow and learn as one with your kids is truly one the most rewarding and enlightening joys of parenting.
sources: Baby Center, Time.com
READ: Scary and long-term effects of spoiling your kids
