Your best friend and her husband have just announced that they’re expecting and you couldn’t be more thrilled. Whether your group of friends already has a gaggle of children running around or this will be the first.
You know that you need to throw the perfect baby shower for your bestie. And you are probably thinking about what to do at a baby shower.
Planning a baby shower can be very stressful, especially if you leave everything until the last minute. The key to a successful and smooth baby shower is to start planning everything as early as possible.
You may think it’s crazy to start this process more than two months before your friend is due to give birth. But just imagine, you need to take into account everyone else’s busy schedules. As well as any hiccups along the way!
To help you plan the perfect baby shower for your best friend’s baby, here are a few tips on what to do at a baby shower.
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What to do 10 Weeks Before the Baby Shower
Pick a date and location for the baby shower
There is some debate over the best time to have the baby shower. But we personally think that sometime towards the end of the second trimester or beginning of the third is the best time.
There are several practical reasons for this: the mummy-to-be won’t be at the stage where they are exhausted all the time, the family still has time to buy things that they don’t receive during the event and it’s early enough that you don’t have to worry about the baby joining you!
For the location, many people choose to have the baby shower at someone’s home or in their condo’s party room just because this will be the most comfortable option for the mummy-to-be (easy access to a washroom is key!).
Make the guestlist
Everyone has busy schedule, so it is important to get to all the members of your squad as early as possible. Let them know the date you’re planning to hold the shower, even if you haven’t finished finalizing all the details so they can block it off in their calendar.
Seven weeks before the baby shower – Party planning time!
Choose a theme, send invitations, plan the menu
These three things go hand in hand and form the crux of party planning. Once you have chosen a theme, the rest of the party pretty much plans itself.
Instead of spending a tedious amount of time planning a menu around your theme, contact a catering company that can take care of your meal, snacks, and decorations for you.
In the Philippines, there are a lot of amazing catering companies that you can talk to so that they can help you plan the perfect baby shower!
Don’t forget to send out the invitations around this time as well! Be sure to include information on where the mummy-to-be has registered for gifts, otherwise, expect to have all your guests asking you for that info in the weeks to come.
Two weeks in advance
Hopefully, you won’t have any stragglers from your invitation list but since there are always a few, two weeks in advance is a good time to follow up with any guests who have yet to RSVP.
The only final tasks you have to are to do a final confirmation with the caterer and plan some awesome baby shower games for the actual party!
Once you’ve decided on the games that you and your friends will play, don’t forget to pick up any supplies you’ll need for the games and some small prizes as well!
The big day!
Relax and enjoy the party. The best part about hiring a caterer is that the only thing you have to do the day of the party is to enjoy yourself, get excited about all the cute gifts and try to win a few games (you did plan them, after all!). Everything else will be taken care of by your caterer!
And don’t forget to take tons of pictures. The mommy-to-be will be too busy having a blast to snap them herself but you gotta do it for the ‘gram!
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Baby shower rules of thumb: What to do at a baby shower
Anyone can host for their friend. There are no specific do’s and don’ts or written etiquette that needs to be followed. However, there are general rules of thumb on what to do at a baby shower.
You can follow this program guide for your baby shower, but you can also mix up, add, or remove events depending on your preferences:
- You can always start by greeting the guests as they arrive and welcoming them to the place.
- Approach the mommy-to-be and ask for her comments
- You can choose either to make an introduction by yourself; let the guests introduce themselves and tell something about how they met the expectant mother, or you can ask the soon-to-be-mom to introduce each guest and tell a little story about how she met them.
- Serve snacks, appetizers, and beverages.
- To get everyone into a party mood: you can have 2-3 games. That can also help guests to be comfortable with one another.
- Serve the main dishes.
- Serve the baby shower cake and dessert.
- Ask everyone to witness the expectant mom as she opens the gifts. You can also opt to let the dad-to-be help his partner open gifts.
- Give the guests time to chat with one another, eat more, giggle, and laugh together.
- As the guests begin to leave, start giving the souvenirs.
Here are some of the rules of thumb for a baby shower:
- It’s okay to have the event even after the baby is born. This set-up can also be a chance to meet the baby and congratulate the mom and dad. The best way to decide when you will set the event is to ask the mom-to-be for her preferences.
- It’s alright to have two baby showers. If the family of the parents-to-be decides to throw a baby shower and you also have a plan for it, you can opt to coordinate with them or do it separately. But remember that you are not obligated to throw a second baby shower if the family already gave her one. What is more important is to make your friend feels supported in her soon-to-be motherhood.
- Traditionally, baby showers are given only for the first child because it is a celebration of a new life for a woman who is now entering motherhood. But since most of us believe that each child is unique and special, it is becoming more common to have a baby shower for each child, even for those who are not firstborns.
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You can also prepare a baby shower if your best friend is adopting. A baby shower is a perfect way to make your best friend feels that they are loved and supported with their decision to adopt a child. Just keep in mind, that you have to be sensitive about how the program will flow. Make sure there are no references about pregnancy and such. Talk to the mommy-to-be to know what should be talked about and what should not be.
- Maybe you cannot decide whether to invite a guest who is having trouble having a kid, or had a miscarriage because you don’t want to add insult to the injury. It is safer to invite her and let her decide whether to come or not than make her feel that you are having fun without her.
- Not all women love surprises. If you are sure that the expectant mom would be happy to have a surprise baby shower, then it would be lots of fun to surprise her. However, if you know that she doesn’t like surprises or if you are not sure, then it is much better to inform her and discuss with her your baby shower plans.
The guest list: Who not to invite to your baby shower
In creating the guest list, it is important to ask the mommy-to-be about who should be and shouldn’t be invited. The traditional way of doing a baby shower is actually an all-women bonding ritual. The focus of the baby shower in that traditional way is to share and exchange stories and tales about labor and motherhood.
However, it is common to include men in most baby showers nowadays. But you have to consider that when you invite a male to a baby shower, the atmosphere of the party might be changed. You must also consider the personality of the dad-to-be and ask the mom-to-be about their preferences on the matter.
There are times in an all-women baby shower that the dad-to-be still appears at the end of the party to thank everyone who attended and spent time to celebrate the life of their soon-to-be-born child.
When planning for a baby shower, you may also coordinate with the family and other friends of the soon-to-be-parents. By including them in your planning, you can have people help you decide. Albeit the theme, color, program flow, and who should be and should not be invited.
Republished with permission from theAsianparent Singapore
Additional information by: Jobelle Macayan