Dating is considered to be the very first special thing you did with your spouse when you were just starting together. This is the time when you talked about anything yet find it all interesting they already look forward to the next one!
You also get to know each other’s behavior, family & educational backgrounds, and so on. You get to see each other’s flaws na medyo nakaka turn-off, but that still makes you kilig. This is also the time when you prepare yourself to look neatly attractive for this awaited date.
Looking back on these factors of your first dates, we can notice the difference of a date in a life of a married couple. Some couples still find time to date once every occasion or every make-up after a passionate discussion or on a work-day off but with the kids.
For some, dating in marriage has already been removed from their priorities and forgotten especially when kids grow up, get busy at work, expenses increase, and need more self-time. Do we really have to keep dating our spouse knowing these much more important matters?
If I will ask you now when did the last time you spent an hour or two with your spouse on a date? It doesn’t matter if it is a candle-lit dinner at home, a full-course meal in a 5-star restaurant, or even a picnic-style by the beach, just the two of you, no kids, no chaperones. Was it a week ago? A year ago? Or maybe 2 years ago before the pandemic happened? Or you can’t even remember when?
Let me share these 5 reasons why you should keep dating in your marriage
1. Marriage is not a ‘Game Over’
Before I got married, I heard this phrase from one of my colleagues: “Game Over na!”. Game over na raw kapag nauwi na sa kasalan ang isang relationship because they though that there are no more excitement, fun and thrill when you are already married.
What they don’t realize is that, marriage is a ‘Level Up’ sa buhay ng dalawang taong nagmamahalan. It unlocks new opportunities, new hope and new phase.
They chose to bring their relationship into light where they can do whatever they want under the blessing of marriage. Kaya hindi dapat nawawala ang pagde-date. Dapat ay mag level-up din, at hindi ma-dead o game over!
2. Keeping the Fire Burning!
Dating in marriage is an effective way to keep the fire burning in your married life. The fire that you start building together by falling deeply in love even with each other’s flaws. That fire of love should keep you maturing, accepting, and getting stronger as you face difficult trials in your married life.
Without this fire, unfaithfulness comes, temptation, hot-headed, impatience, irritability, and many other reasons that can lead your marriage to a worst-case scenario.
READ MORE:
REAL STORIES: “Importance of ‘pagbubukod’ with your husband.”
Marriage Tips: How to be a good husband to your wife
REAL STORIES: “I met my husband on Tinder”
3. Quality Time
Maybe you are arguing a lot, easily get irritated, and no longer understand each other is because you are lacking of Quality Time.
I know time is something that we cannot give easily, especially in the midst of busy life at work, business, house chores, with the kids, and other plans.
Manage your time and do it intentionally. Hindi naman kailangan ng magarbo, di kailangan sa mamahaling restaurant, di kailangan may pa gown at regalo.
The goal here is to give your time and attention to one another, to refresh you and your spouse.
4. Deep Talks
Simple yet quality date can be just having a midnight snack in bed while looking back on how you two started together, how beautiful your family has become or how your children have grown.
Laugh about things, about this morning, last night, about the movie you just watched, or the funny post you saw online.
Walang boring sa taong you have interest in lalo na sa asawa mo. Dating in marriage also allows us to openly talk about your current relationship.
Everyone is calm, that’s why you may want to talk about your past issues gently and calmly to resolve them. It’s the best opportunity to say Sorry.
5. Be the Role Models
It is easier to teach our kids by example rather than words. We’ve proven that through several things already as parents. This time, let us be their standard of a happily married couple. May our relationship be the one they are looking up to and dream of having in the future.
Walang deadline ang kilig, walang expiration date ang Marriage at lalong walang age limit ang pagde-date. Kaya when you’re children see how you honor your marriage, they will love you moreover. Kahit may edad na, mahina na ang tuhod, o kahit madaming kailangang tapusin, you still choose be with each other.
As I end, I want to leave this question, “Is your marriage important to you?” If yes, please, mag date kayo. Kahit sa bahay lang, walang gastos, wala ang mga bata, just the two of you.
Refresh yourselves. Look back on how you two started together. Talk about how beautiful your children are. Laugh about things. Most importantly, Say Sorry if you may have past issues. Trust me, it’s all worth it!
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