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15 Hilarious tweets married couples can surely relate to

3 min read
15 Hilarious tweets married couples can surely relate to

"Marriage is basically agreeing to not sleep in a comfortable position again for the rest of your life."

Good marriages aren’t only filled with love but a great sense of humor.

And there is no shortage of people who totally just get this on twitter. We’ve rounded up the funniest, and most on-point tweets that are sure to crack up married couples.

1.

Me: Look, I love you, But I made exactly the amount of cheese & crackers I want to eat right now.
Wife: But I only…
Me: EXACTLY the amount — keith (@tchrquotes) November 4, 2014

2.

Marriage is basically just whispering, “Are you awake? I need to show you this cat video.” — Mel Evans (@mel_evans) February 22, 2016

3.

The best thing about being married is having someone who can tell you if something is disgusting or not… — Boyd’s Backyard (@TheBoydP) February 24, 2016

4.

Marriage is basically agreeing to not sleep in a comfortable position again for the rest of your life. — ⚡️QUΞΞN ΔLΔNΔ⚡️ (@AlanaRockz) November 16, 2015

5.

Today’s my husband’s birthday, so… *flips coin to see if I should shave above the knee* — Ashley Austrew (@ashleyaustrew) January 29, 2016

6.

You pee too loud. – Marriage — KC of TX (@kcmoore51) February 12, 2016

7.

[runs to the door to greet wife]
I’m afraid there’s been a terrible accident involving all the things you asked me to do today. — David Hughes (@david8hughes) February 28, 2016

8.

Husband got excited thinking I was touching myself under the covers but I was actually just opening a Kit Kat I didn’t wanna share. — Valerie (@ValeeGrrl) December 30, 2015

9.

[rolls over in bed and whispers to wife]
“I ate like 75 chicken nuggets today” — Rocky Momax (@rockymomax) February 16, 2016

10.

Me: Wait, so it’s cool for you to use my phone charger but I can’t touch yours? Wife: Correct. — Rock (@TheMichaelRock) January 28, 2016

11.

It’s 3pm and my husband and I are still sitting in bed waiting for the other to get up and make coffee this morning. — Kate Hall (@KateWhineHall) February 14, 2015

12.

Wife: You pick dinner. Me: Pizza. Wife: No. Me: Tacos. Wife: No. Me: Subs. Wife: No. Me: WHAT DO YOU WANT?! Wife: It’s up to you. — Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) February 22, 2016

13.

Marriage is like coffee. First it’s really hot. Then it’s just right. Then it helps you get off your ass and do things. — Josh Hara (@yoyoha) February 10, 2016

14.

Marriage Morning Ritual Year One: *kiss*. I love you!
Year Five: Have a great day! *air kiss*
Year Ten: Grunt; stumbles out the door. — Stacey Sordahl (@DrunkAtThePTA) February 25, 2016

15.

Marriage is essentially just having somebody who you can have regular conversations with while one or both of you are stark naked. — lauren robinson (@laurenjoyness) September 15, 2015

 

READ: 10 Funny parenting tweets 

If you have any insights, questions or comments regarding the topic, please share them in our Comment box below. Like us on Facebook and follow us on Google+ to stay up-to-date on the latest from theAsianparent.com Philippines!

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Bianchi Mendoza

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