The One Skill This Teacher Wants Every Parent to Teach Before School Starts — And It’s Not What You’d Expect

A teacher reveals the top skill kids need before school — it’s saying no to kids, not reading, writing, or speaking.

As parents gear up to prepare their little ones for the classroom, a kindergarten teacher’s heartfelt advice is making waves for all the right reasons. While most parents focus on academic basics or practical skills, Emily Perkins, a 28-year-old educator, believes the most important lesson begins with saying no to kids.

Saying No To Kids: Why ‘No’ Should Be Part of Every Child’s Vocabulary

@emmymckenny No. No no no. No. #teachersoftiktok #momsoftiktok #gentleparenting #controversial ♬ original sound – Emperky

In a widely shared TikTok video, Perkins addresses a question she often hears: “How can I get my child ready for school?” Her response is refreshingly simple — and strikingly important.

“No isn’t a bad word. Children need to learn that when an adult says ‘no,’ it’s not an invitation to negotiate or debate,” she shares.

This one small boundary, she believes, has a huge impact on how children interact with teachers, classmates, and school rules. Without it, young learners may struggle with authority, instructions, and the fast-paced demands of the school day.

Saying No To Kids: Boundaries Help Keep Everyone Safe — And Learning

Respecting “no” isn’t just about behavior. It’s about creating a safe and productive environment for everyone. For example, during a fire drill or emergency, children need to respond quickly and follow instructions without question.

As Perkins explains, “During emergency procedures, children must respond immediately to instructions. I love explaining ‘why’ when possible, but sometimes immediate compliance is necessary for safety.”

In moments like these, knowing how to accept “no” without resistance could make a crucial difference.

Practical Skills Can Wait — Emotional Readiness Comes First

There’s no doubt that being able to open a lunchbox or zip up a bag is helpful. But according to Perkins, emotional readiness outweighs convenience.

“I’m happy to help with practical skills like opening snacks or putting straws in juice boxes. Those things don’t prevent me from teaching. But when a child can’t accept ‘no,’ teaching becomes nearly impossible.”

A child’s ability to manage frustration or disappointment helps them thrive not just academically, but socially and emotionally too.

What This Means for Parents in Singapore

Raising respectful, responsive children is a common goal among parents in Singapore. This advice is a timely reminder that soft skills — especially boundary recognition — are just as vital as ABCs and 123s.

Children who understand that “no” can be loving and constructive are more likely to:

Adapt well to classroom routines
Respond quickly during emergencies
Navigate friendships with respect
Build positive relationships with teachers

By normalizing “no” in the home, parents equip their children with the tools they need to thrive in school and beyond. As Perkins puts it, that simple understanding may be the greatest gift you can give your child before they ever step through the school gates.

Originally published on theAsianparent Singapore