I knew how hard pregnancy was back then but I never imagine that it was harder, I knew how it feels good inside your tummy but no one told me how hard it is to handle, and I knew, but I was never prepared.
My pregnancy story
Here is my pregnancy journey.
I have 3 kids already and experienced 3 different kinds of pregnancy journey. But I think the worst pregnancy I had experienced was on my first born, but had the worst delivery on my second and had the most emotional, fearing pregnancy was on my last or 3rd born this pandemic.
But what I really wanted to share is when I got pregnant to my first born. I can still remember how scared I am, I am so lost and miserable back then when I found out and I didn’t know what to do, me and his father is not married yet and had a lot of relationship complications between us and families plus I don’t know how to tell the news to my parents who are both OFW. So, it really stressed and freaked me out. To be honest, (no judgement) I am 27 years old that time, working as a call center agent, full of mixed emotions I am happy yet sad. In that time I’m terrified, not ready still but have to face it and I tried to pull myself together to at least carry it on.
So my traumatic experience has begun from having vertigo, morning sickness to gassy stomach ache. I vomited most of the time. From the moment I wake up, till I got on the bus. (not to mention that I even puke in every corner of the bridge!) That’s how worst it was. I even somehow spent my shift in the clinic and toilet, reason why I had to file early sick leave.
The challenges I faced
Making my pregnancy tougher is when my asthma begun to attacked once again, and I also had UTI (which I had both for the whole 3 semesters on and off. Because of that I have to change my ob-gyn for several times. I had to go through different several laboratories in each clinics I went to. Medicines are just the same ’til I no longer drink it. I got tired and cried every after my check up and every night knowing that no one could give the best prescription. (Due to taking the same medicines all over again, I became resistant to safe medications for pregnant). So, I’ve seen a Pulmo Doctor already and finally found the best ob-gyn I’ve known so far in Antipolo. I was cured. But it didn’t end there.
My pregnancy journey. | Image from iStock
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So I was in my second semester, I got well but we learnt that I am almost malnourished, wanting to be healed , I failed to focused on the medicines I have to take for my baby. Lack of nutrients, calcium, vitamins, weight almost everything making the intense sutuation heightened. Grateful that I was able to cover what I lacked, and saved my baby from lossing.
Everything went smoothly till I was required to do another laboratory tests for my last trimester. It was then I found out that I got Gestational Diabetes naman. So, I have to go on a diet and check my sugar every after meal. So once again, it freaked me out and cried every single day. I had to make immediate response to it, to make sure that my baby will not adopt it and our due date is heading, I can’t afford to lost it.
Why I made it
The mixed emotions that I’m experiencing really affected me. I don’t know how to make myself healthy or to think anymore. My immune system is failing me. I did everything t I could do to make that whole journey a good one but it’s terrifying thinking that something bad might happen to my baby inside me. All the negative things that inside my head is really hitting me hard.
For me, the whole thing was crucial. Note that I am taking medicine to avoid pre-term or ‘yung pampakapit from the very beginning. I always had spotting and that’s the reasons why I always had to bed rest. I tried my very best to be calm, to be happy, and to be healthy. But all of that are still not enough from my perspective.
My pregnancy journey, and all the things that I realized.
You know, I always pray to God. No matter how tough, terrifying and heartbreaking my whole journey was. I never lost hope, questioned God and I always keep my faith in him. In those trying time I never let my faith be shaken. Everything was uncontrollable and I can’t help it. So, I surrender everything to Him.
I am lucky enough and so much grateful, as I delivered him safely. The pain is tolerable. I stayed in delivery room for 5-6 hours only. My baby is very healthy. All the laboratory tests were all good! And it’s true, the moment I heard him cry, all my fears washed away. A tear dropped in my eyes as I first held him.
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