Are your kids driving you nuts?
Life is stressful as it is, but entering the world of parenthood can usher in unimaginable bouts of anxiety and strain — enough to test the patience of a saint. Whether you are handling a colicky newborn, a whining toddler or a troubled teenager; or all three, frazzled nerves and ruffled feathers definitely come with the full-time job of being a parent. And if you throw in a severe case of sleep-deprivation, your home can easily turn into a crazy circus show.
In such situations it’s normal to lose your cool. But venting anger in a wrong way can easily leave physical and emotional scars on your children. In fact shaking an infant, even for just one heated moment can easily lead to death.
So even in the face of extreme anger and exasperation, it is important to stay calm and collected. Counting one to ten when you are about to throw a royal fit is not that simple and probably won’t work. Here are 10 helpful tips that may help you stay clam amidst the household chaos.
Take charge of your emotions
While this may be difficult to do when you are just about to hit the roof, take a moment to breathe deeply and remember the times you were successful in controlling your emotions. Keep in mind that we all have the power to change our moods, you just need to have a reminder that it is possible, despite seemingly intolerable aggravations and provocations your little imp may have thought of.
Be Prepared
Beat anxiety attacks with preparation. This includes having a least a month’s worth of salary tucked for a rainy day. You also need to make sure you have ample emergency supplies such as water, food and first aid kits.
Identify what triggers your anger
Self-awareness is important. Keep a journal for those situations that you feel like you are about to fly off the handle. See if you can notice a certain pattern such as a particular time of day, lack of exercise, hunger level or an extra busy calendar. Even the noise level of your TV can significantly contribute to emotional outbursts. This will help you understand your emotions better and be able to create tranquil environment for yourself.
Take care of yourself
More often than not, anger is often due to our reaction to a certain situation, which is surprisingly triggered by simple aggravators such as hunger and lack of sleep. Make sure to start a busy day with a light breakfast then continue to eat healthy and energy-giving food throughout the day.
Keep a regular routine of meditation and prayer
To help you keep calm that chaotic mind and frazzled nerves, make sure to allocate at least 15 minutes a day to simply sit quietly and meditate. This will help you draw from your inner energy and keep everything in perspective.
Understand your children
This may be surprising but there is actually a reason behind your child’s seemingly obnoxious act, tantrum or mischievous prank. Often, there is a developmental milestone that is usually associated with your kid’s behavior. Take time to understand the underlying reasons. This will help you development a better sense of compassion, empathy and ultimately, tolerance.
Take deep breaths
There is actually a scientific explanation behind this tried and tested advice. Diaphragmatic breathing effectively reduces stress and will allow you to have enough time to make a more rational assessment of any situation. This will also help you regain a stronger sense of control.
Visualise
Imagine yourself as a calm and cool person as you strive to be one. This may be difficult but a good diversion is to visualise a person who best embodies such traits. Now imagine how that person would likely react in a particular situation.
Stop, think and speak
Just when you feel anger swelling up, remind yourself the importance of keeping a firm control of your emotions. Avoid picking up the baby, ask for help or wait until you regain your composure and calm.
Consciously lower your voice
Shouting will only serve to scare your young child. Try to keep your voice even and maintain a soft tone to exude calmness, even if you are anything but.
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