X
TAP top app download banner
theAsianparent Philippines Logo
theAsianparent Philippines Logo
EnglishFilipino
Product Guide
Sign in
  • Money Tips
    • Savings
    • Insurance
    • Loans
    • Investments
    • Government Benefits
  • Building a BakuNation
  • Becoming a Parent
    • Trying to Conceive
    • Pregnancy
    • Delivery
    • Losing a Baby
    • Project Sidekicks
  • Ages & Stages
    • Baby
    • Toddler Years
    • Preschool Age
    • Kids
    • Preteen & Teen
  • Parenting
    • Parent's Guide
    • News
    • Relationship & Sex
  • Health & Wellness
    • Diseases & Injuries
    • Allergies & Conditions
    • Vaccinations
    • COVID-19
  • Education
    • Preschool
    • K-12
    • Special Education Needs
  • Lifestyle Section
    • Celebrities
    • Contests & Promotions
    • Home
    • Travel and Leisure
    • Fashion
    • Fitness
    • Wellness
    • Money
  • Become a VIP
  • Press Room
  • TAP Recommends
  • Shopping

The Child Has The Answer (Part 1 of The Parent Coach Series)

3 min read
The Child Has The Answer (Part 1 of The Parent Coach Series)

As parents, we often feel the urge to teach our children what we know and to pass on the lessons we have learnt from our personal experiences. We are naturally driven by a loving intention to prepare them to meet the challenges life.

Dont be fooled! Your child has the answers

Don’t be fooled! Your child has the answers

As parents, we often feel the urge to teach our children what we know and to pass on the lessons we have learnt from our personal experiences. We are naturally driven by a loving intention to prepare them to meet the challenges life. However, as coaches, we might at times need to withhold that parental urge to impart knowledge. Instead of teaching, our primary task as coaches is to create opportunities and structures that promote and support the process of self-discovery. By harnessing the sense of curiosity and inquisitiveness in the child, even a five-year-old can know more about dinosaurs or the importance of honesty than an average adult.

Coaching works on a presupposition that the child has the answer, and that the parent has the questions to facilitate its discovery. This applies to coaching our children in any area, be it solving a mathematical problem or figuring out the best move in a game of chess. The answer might be obvious to us but not to the child. It is tempting to simply spoon-feed the child with the answer we have in mind so as to end his ‘struggle’ and get him to carry on with the task at hand. But we must not deprive the child the experience of discomfort. Confusion, struggle, and discomfort are often necessary for the expansion of the mind so as to accommodate new knowledge or ideas.

Guiding and supporting the child through the process of discovery might require immense patience, but that is both essential and worthwhile. In guiding the child, strive to be non-directive and avoid the use of leading questions. For example, a question such as “Don’t you think A is better than B?” tends to lead him to the former. Instead, ask questions that help him gain awareness of his thought patterns (e.g. What are you thinking about now?) and encourage the exploration of new lines of thought (e.g. What else is possible?). Give the child ample time and space to explore his own thinking.

Advertisement

Learning by self-discovery is undeniably more effective than being told what the ‘right’ answer ought to be. Its benefits go beyond knowledge acquisition for the child. In essence, coaching is about bringing out the greatness within the child. By allowing a child to explore freely and find his own answers to his problems, we effectively create a safe space that draws out his inner qualities such as curiosity, resourcefulness, creativity, independence and confidence. The ultimate victory is when the child feels, “I can do it by myself!” It builds confidence and nurtures his self-esteem.

Partner Stories
Kids at risk of stunting? This Growth Calculator can help moms find out plus predict their future height!
Kids at risk of stunting? This Growth Calculator can help moms find out plus predict their future height!
5 Tips To Challenge Your Child For His All-Around Development
5 Tips To Challenge Your Child For His All-Around Development
BATANG MATIBAY: How this OFW's 12-year-old Son Shines at School and at Home
BATANG MATIBAY: How this OFW's 12-year-old Son Shines at School and at Home
When Shopping For Tablets For Your Kids What Should Be On Your Checklist?
When Shopping For Tablets For Your Kids What Should Be On Your Checklist?

Remember, the effectiveness of coaching lies not in what we know, but the questions we ask. We need to trust the process and believe that, with proper guidance, they are able to find their own answers.

Got a parenting concern? Read articles or ask away and get instant answers on our app. Download theAsianparent Community on iOS or Android now!

img
Written by

RobynMURRAY

Become a Contributor

  • Home
  • /
  • Development
  • /
  • The Child Has The Answer (Part 1 of The Parent Coach Series)
Share:
  • Eye Strain Symptoms: Ano ang mga Ito at Paano Maiiwasan

    Eye Strain Symptoms: Ano ang mga Ito at Paano Maiiwasan

  • 5 Simple Ways to Improve Focus in Children

    5 Simple Ways to Improve Focus in Children

  • Kids at risk of stunting? This Growth Calculator can help moms find out plus predict their future height!
    Partner Stories

    Kids at risk of stunting? This Growth Calculator can help moms find out plus predict their future height!

  • Eye Strain Symptoms: Ano ang mga Ito at Paano Maiiwasan

    Eye Strain Symptoms: Ano ang mga Ito at Paano Maiiwasan

  • 5 Simple Ways to Improve Focus in Children

    5 Simple Ways to Improve Focus in Children

  • Kids at risk of stunting? This Growth Calculator can help moms find out plus predict their future height!
    Partner Stories

    Kids at risk of stunting? This Growth Calculator can help moms find out plus predict their future height!

Get advice on your pregnancy and growing baby. Sign up for our newsletter
  • Money Tips
  • Building a BakuNation
  • Pregnancy
  • Parenting
  • Lifestyle Section
  • FAMILY & HOME
  • TAP Community
  • Advertise With Us
  • Contact Us
  • Become a Contributor


  • Singapore flag Singapore
  • Thailand flag Thailand
  • Indonesia flag Indonesia
  • Philippines flag Philippines
  • Malaysia flag Malaysia
  • Sri-Lanka flag Sri Lanka
  • India flag India
  • Vietnam flag Vietnam
  • Australia flag Australia
  • Japan flag Japan
  • Nigeria flag Nigeria
  • Kenya flag Kenya
© Copyright theAsianparent 2025. All rights reserved
About Us|Team|Privacy Policy|Terms of Use |Sitemap HTML
  • Tools
  • Articles
  • Feed
  • Poll

We use cookies to ensure you get the best experience. Learn MoreOk, Got it

We use cookies to ensure you get the best experience. Learn MoreOk, Got it