5 Surprising reasons why it’s okay to fight in front of your kids

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If you've argued with your partner in front of your children before, then don't worry! There are actually 5 good reasons why it's okay. Read this to know what they are.


These are the surprising reasons why it’s okay to fight in front of your kid.

Why It’s Okay to Fight in Front of Your Kids

Every relationship goes through rough patches. Conflicts and fights arise even in harmonious marriages. Dr. Gordon Harold, a researcher at Cardiff University said it’s unrealistic to say that parents shouldn’t argue in front of their children. He added that disagreements are a “natural part of relationships.”

However, we can’t deny the fact that fighting in front of your kids can have bad effects on them.  Psychotherapist Tina B. Tessina said kids get anxious when they watch their parents argue because it threatens the security of their home environment.

Child and adolescent psychologist Nancy Cahir said that if children consistently hear arguments and they don’t get resolved, they’ll have difficulty with attachment, adjustment, and trusting people. 

The harmful effects are real but good things also happen when kids see you fight: 

1. They will learn to recognize that being angry is okay

Richard Gallagher, director of the Parenting Institute at New York University’s Child Study Center, said that children need to recognize that “anger is a normal legitimate emotion” and that even happy couples like their parents can disagree.

It’s important that they see their parents show real emotions and don’t pretend that things are okay when it’s actually not. Note that it should be constructive fighting wherein parents maintain a respectful stance no matter how angry they are.

There should be no physicality or name calling involved. Physical violence can be emotionally damaging to a child’s well-being.

2. They see how conflicts can be resolved amicably

Good Morning America parenting contributor Ann Pleshette Murphy said if kids see that conflicts can be resolved constructively, they learn what it means to compromise, have compassion, and solve arguments.

They are also assured that disagreements with the people they love don’t mean it’s the end of their relationship with them.

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