Finally, your most-awaited free time has come after a long and tiring day.
You grab your phone to check Facebook, then you see your mommy friend’s post with the hashtag #MilestoneUnlocked because her child has already learned how to read. You scroll down a bit and see another photo of a happy family posing with Mickey and Minnie Mouse while vacationing in Disneyland.
You are genuinely happy for a brief moment, but it quickly disappears because in the back of your mind, you are wishing that it was you with your family having fun in Disneyland!
The last straw that breaks the camel’s back is seeing your mommy blogger friend’s #Blessed and #Grateful post because she has received a lot of gifts from brands by mail. She even makes an entire album of gifts to showcase them.
These days, I am starting to believe that social media is for the bravehearted. Social media has its advantages and perks, but I’ve come to realize that, especially when you're bordering on suffering from social media addiction, it has also become a platform that destroys a mother’s soul. Social media addiction has become a problem for a lot of moms, but remember that you are not alone in your struggle.
These are the reasons why social media can cause problems:
1. It makes you feel envious
We feel envious when we start to count other people’s blessings instead of our own. Living in a highly digital society where information is easy with a tap of your smartphone screen, being envious of other people’s lives as seen through their #Goals is inevitable. We are only humans!
Our innermost dreams, passions, aspirations, and goals turn into our kryptonite when we don’t achieve them or are placed on hold. Envy is aggravated when we see others having things or experiencing stuff that we can only wish for.
Envy is a process. You don’t get jealous right away. It is a progressive feeling that we need to watch out for.
2. It makes you compare yourself to others
Moms take the greatest hit when their children’s milestones and achievements are involved. For those suffering from social media addiction, you might constantly feel that you're not 'good enough' as a mom.
If you’re real and honest enough to admit it, there won’t be one instance that you have not compared your child to someone else’s. You have hidden it so well at the farthest corner of your heart.
3. It makes you feel pressured
Do you feel the pressure to be the “perfect” mom to impress other family members, especially the in-laws? Perhaps even in your own circle of mommy friends?
Do you feel you are not doing your job and you lack in so many ways as a mother? Do you feel the pressure to breastfeed, have certain kind of babywear, or to use cloth-diapers?
Worse, have you ever been shamed because of your choices as a mother?
Keep Your Mom Soul Alive
Which of these three silent soul killers do you need to deal with right now? Let’s follow these three steps to addressing it:
1. Acknowledge your inner “mom soul killer”
Is it envy? Are you always being compared to someone else? Do you suffer from great pressure from the people around you? Who are they?
Identify and deal with it by being content. Look around you and find something you are thankful for. Bear in mind: you only become envious when you count other people’s blessings before your own. If you feel like envy is entering your heart, be alert and focus on what you have, big or small.
This is also another symptom of social media addiction that can cause you to go on a downward spiral.
2. Be thankful for everything you have
Gratitude turns what we have to being enough. Be grateful for every blessing that comes your way and your family’s. Comparison is poison. Stay in your own lane of life because each one of us have our own values, interests, lifestyle, and set of people around us. Even identical twins still have their differences, so why should we compare?
If you constantly fall into the trap of comparing your child to others, let me share with you one of my favorite quotes that I have read online. It has been a great help in my journey of raising my girls.
“Don’t compare your child to others. There’s no comparison between the sun and the moon. They shine when it’s their time.”
3. Be like the bamboo: the higher you grow, the deeper you bow
Choose your mommy friends well and grow together. They will be your tribe of real moms whom you will find encouragement and support from throughout your journey as a mother. Find these women who strive to be real than perfect.
What better way to keep your soul alive by always having room for growth as a mother? Stand up for your choices and be ready to communicate with them, not in a proud manner, but in a loving and respectful way.
Now that we know what our silent soul killers as a mom are and how we can protect ourselves from them, this awareness will allow us to choose our battles well. If you are feeling envious of your friend’s life, give yourself a break. Don’t torture yourself by visiting her Facebook wall or watch her IG stories every day.
You know when you’re most vulnerable, right? If hiding a friend from your feed for now will help you get over your envious feeling, do it. Try not to be like a moth hovering over a flame!
Baby Dove: A Partner for #RealMoms
Baby Dove understands the difficulties and pressures we face as mothers. Like your family and your mommy friends, Baby Dove is here for #RealMoms like us. It’s got our back in caring for our baby’s delicate skin care needs.
#RealMoms are smart in choosing the best skincare for their baby. Baby Dove understands that as moms we care for quality and safety of our children. Baby Dove carefully chooses the best and safest ingredients in their products. Who knows, when you visit #BabyDovePH on Facebook, you might find a real mom like you to journey motherhood with.
Celebrate Your Beautiful Soul
Know who you are, and be the real mom that you can be. All moms have imperfections, but having these imperfections is what makes us true and beautiful. There is only one you. Embrace it. Be grateful and humble in your journey. That is how you will keep your mommy soul alive.
