For any woman, marriage and building a family is something they have been looking forward to. While marriage is undoubtedly an exciting and significant event in a woman’s life, this phase is life-changing.
Marriage changes everything. Your “all about me” will now be “all about us and all about your family”. With such a big change in your life, you might lose yourself in the process.
How do you make sure you don’t do that?
Pregnancy and Childbirth
Body change during pregnancy is one of the changes a woman undergoes. This change is clearly visible. Our bodies go through various changes and stress during pregnancy and after giving birth.
The support a mother receives during pregnancy and after giving birth is a major factor in determining how she looks after her mental and physical well-being.
How much support do you get? Is your husband with you throughout your pregnancy? Does he make sure to be with you during prenatal checkups? Does your partner give you the reassurance that you are still beautiful despite gaining weight?
Having a strong support system during pregnancy is important for having a healthy pregnancy and a safe delivery.
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Raising a Child
As they say, it takes a village to raise a child. Lucky are those moms who have a household or family members including parents, in-laws, and siblings who will be there to help take care of the kids. For mothers like me whose family is a thousand miles away, raising a child is challenging.
Parenting has always been a demanding job and the added pressure of social norms makes it more difficult. Beyond societal influences, moms like me have challenges including teaching values, discipline, budgeting, and providing for the needs of our children on top of having sleepless nights when your child is sick and hardly managing your time between household chores, work, laundry, taking care of your child, meal preparations among other things.
Mothering is among the most complex and demanding work imaginable. It can require learning the stages of child development, becoming a nutritionist by preparing healthy meals, and playing the role of a nurse or a caregiver. This being said, pure fatigue is a universal experience among mothers.
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Society expects that as women, it is our obligation to raise our children while we perform the role of being a wife. Truth be told, parenting is a shared responsibility. The relationship between the spouses must be based on mutual respect, assistance, and fair distribution of responsibilities.
Healthy parenting is one that involves both mothers and fathers taking active participation in a child’s life. A father’s role is not just limited to being a provider for the family. The quality of a father can be seen in the goals, dreams, and aspirations he sets not only for himself but for his family. Suffice it to say, our husbands play a vital role in helping us take care of the children. Our husbands can play the role of being our kids’ playmates, companions, teachers, and protectors and are expected to be 100% involved in raising children.
Wife Duties
Marriage transforms the life of a woman. As a wife, we are expected to serve our husbands, prepare their food, and take care of their clothing and personal needs.
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However, while we perform the duty of being a wife, we also have the role of a mother who has to take care of the children and their needs. As a worker, we are also expected to be professional and good employees. Women assume multiple responsibilities as wives, mothers, daughters, employees, and members of society.
The role of a wife in a marriage is essential to bring positivity and keep the family stronger. As a wife, it is our duty to love our husband unconditionally. More than honoring, supporting, respecting, and being available to our husbands, we are also expected to fulfill their needs.
But let’s be honest. If you are a wife, a mother, and an employee, performing multiple roles may mean being able to take care of your husband and children but being unable to keep your home clean and organized. You may be able to cook food, spend time with children and do household chores but perform less effectively at work.
Take Care of Yourself
This is non-negotiable. In fact, you should focus on yourself before you take care of others.
You cannot become the wife, mother, and employee that you want to be unless you prioritize yourself.
Don’t burden yourself with responsibilities. Seek help from your husband or partners, take a break and relax.
A happy wife is a happy life. Remember, you are a wife and a mother and not a housemaid. It is important that you value yourself while navigating marriage, parenting, and career.
