Dr. Deborah Gilboa, a family physician and parenting expert, says that chores make your kid better. She tells us that instead of focusing on the achievements or just the happiness of our children, such as giving them gadgets or letting them use their phones, we should instead make them do chores and focus on their character.
A shift of focus to character-building instead of achievements would mean that the children will grow up to be more responsible adults.
She talked to 1500 well-off parents living in Silicon Valley, and asked if they were given chores as children. All of them said yes, but only 4 parents agreed when she asked if they give their children chores now. Most of them say that their children are too busy to do chores.
In order to build good character, she tells us that we should let kids do chores, and not just focus on schoolwork. She says that family work would show kids that they’re not above anyone, and that they’re not exempt from helping others. She also constantly reminds us to value being a good person above academic achievements.
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Mentioning three major gaps in society; the Wealth Gap, the Health Gap, and the Education Gap; she says that the solutions to these problems won’t come from high SAT scores, but they will come from problem solvers with good character.
Doctor Gilboa also said that “We need to have empathy without intervention, and that if we concentrate on their character, the accomplishments will follow. We should let our kids solve their own problems, especially if they can solve it by themselves.”
Here’s her entire TEDx talk about the expectation gap:
“We solve every problem, and we bulldoze every obstacle. Our expectations for their achievements are rising, but our expectations for their character are dropping.”
READ: The long-term effects of spoiling your kids.
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