Dear Erika’s Mom and Dad,
I write to you with a heavy heart, knowing the unspeakable pain you are enduring. I lost my sister to suicide too. She was 17, just like Vonn Erika. She was my shining star, the brightest among the four of us siblings, and I see so much of her in the way others speak about Vonn Erika. It breaks my heart because I understand the weight of this loss, and I want you to know you are not alone in this unimaginable grief.
My sister had a light about her—a warmth that could fill any room. She had the most beautiful smile and a charm that drew people in. It’s so hard to reconcile how someone who brought so much joy to others could carry so much pain within themselves. It’s a paradox that haunts us, but it’s also a reminder of how deeply they felt everything—the good and the bad.
Like your family, I’ve struggled with the “what ifs” and the “why couldn’ts.” I’ve replayed moments over and over, wishing I could have seen her struggles more clearly, wishing I could have done something to ease her pain. But what I’ve come to realize, though it took time, is that their battles were never about a lack of love from us. They were fighting a storm that we couldn’t always see, and their decision was not a reflection of us but of the enormity of that storm.
Image from Canva
Please know that the love you had for Vonn Erika—the care, the joy, the memories you built together—are what truly defined her life. Not the way it ended. The way you speak about her, the memories you carry, will continue to keep her spirit alive. I know how impossible it feels to accept that such a vibrant light could be gone, but even now, her light shines. In your love for her, in the people she touched, and in the memories you’ll carry forward, she remains with you.
My sister’s death changed me forever, and so will this loss change you. But it’s okay to lean on others and let them hold you up when the weight feels unbearable. It’s okay to cry, to question, and to grieve in your own way and in your own time. What matters most is honoring Vonn Erika’s memory, not through perfection, but through love—for her, for yourselves, and for those still around you.
Image from Canva
Your daughter’s beauty, her charm, her light—it is not gone. It lives in you and in everyone who was lucky enough to know her. I hope you hold onto that as tightly as you can, and when you feel like it’s slipping, let others remind you.
Sending you love, understanding, and the deepest sympathy,
Carla
May katanungan tungkol sa pagpapalaki ng anak? Basahin ang mga artikulo o magtanong sa kapwa magulang sa aming app. I-download ang theAsianparent Community sa iOS o Android!
